I can't control anything that's going on

I tried to write how I feel but I can’t put the words together.
I’ve lied to everyone I know and the only time I could express myself was to a girl who used to be my best friend, she only told me not to be so hard on myself, a few days after she barely answered me.
I know people are busy and they have something to do with their lives but I think it’s unfair that I’m always there and nobody cares now that I need them.
I don’t know how to talk about how I feel and I’m too afraid to do it, I feel like everyone’s going to laugh at me, my family has done it before.
I don’t even know where to begin or what to say and maybe you won’t be able to understand what I’m trying to say, I can’t either.
I’m sorry if the title or the category doesn’t match with this but it’s always like that, I try to say something, end up saying a different thing and then I cry until I fall asleep.
I don’t trust anyone that’s another reason why I don’t talk about how I feel.
This has no sense at all.

Hey @fuecris14,

The very fact that you posted on here is a great start my friend. If you need to share more do NOT feel ashamed. I get off track trying to express myself in a coherent manner all of the time. We will not laugh at you nor judge you, so please whatever is burdening you my friend feel free to share as we are all here for you! You have been other people’s rock and now it is time to get some support of your own.

Much love,