It’s so easy to fall back into. Effortless really. No trips to the liquor store, no calls to a dealer, and no nagging feeling that you’re about to ruin your life with one indulgence. Just pull out your phone and off you go to fantasyland. When it’s all over, your day goes right back on track. Like they say, it’s a victimless vice, right?
I’m in a small group right now that focuses a lot on porn consumption. I struggle with it too, but being in this group has given me a lot to think about. How ready are you to give it up? How ready are you to surrender your shame instead of clinging to it? Are you willing to read scripture when you’re tempted to watch porn? Are you willing to contact prayer partners or community groups? Making non-judgmental people aware of your urges is a really good way to be held accountable and arrest those urges. That’s why people in recovery have sponsors they can call when they’re feeling vulnerable. It’s awkward, and I’m not ready to take that step yet. But I do recognize that hiding my porn consumption only protects my porn consumption. It doesn’t protect me or other people, and it doesn’t set anything free except my ability to do it again. Meanwhile I walk around with shame that I try to hide from myself by mitigating it, rationalizing it, and putting it out of my mind.
One guy in my group has been porn free for almost a year because he’s transparent when he’s vulnerable and has others hold him accountable. He says he struggles with the temptation about as often as anyone else, but he knows he has a way out. If you really want to go extreme, he suggested an app called Covenant Eyes that monitors your browsing and alerts your accountability partners if you’re wandering into risky territory.
And then there’s this song that is really catchy and a porn buzzkill.
