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I don’t know what to do anymore, I’m so tired


#1

I can’t talk to my boyfriend about anything, he either calls me a crybaby or tells me I’m overreacting.
Let me tell you a little back story…
When I was 5 months pregnant with his son, he cheated on me. I was completely heart broken because he promised me he would never do that. I didn’t understand why he would do that to me, he told me he loved me all the time but then I find messages to the girl saying he’s going to be single soon. All this happened in October of 2018. I’m trying my best to get over it but it’s so freaking hard. And he doesn’t help, he doesn’t talk to me about anything. He says I don’t understand him but how could I when he WONT talk to me. We are constantly fighting because I’m having a hard time trusting him. He says he’s sorry but that’s just words to me. I’ve told him plenty of times actions speak louder than words. But he just doesn’t seem to get that. And with all this going on my depression is getting worse. I told him last night that everybody would just be better off without me and all he said was don’t talk like that and then he has ignored me all day. I love him with all my freaking heart but I’m getting so close to just giving up completely. With him and with my own life. I’m so tired of feeling this way but I don’t know what to do. I put on a happy face for my son because I don’t want him to see me like this even if he’s only 3 months old. But I just want to give up.


#2

Hey,
So a cheating SO is never good, and it’s even worse when there is a kid involved. I would suggest that you shouldn’t worry about him, but in fact just focus on you and your son. It’s a struggle for sure. I can’t relate to what you’re going through but I can provide a listening ear. Just don’t give up on yourself or your son.

-m1dn1ght


#3

Hang in there. That is a lot of stress and thanks for reaching out on here. It sounds like this relationship is hurting you in a lot of ways. Please remember to put your life first. Your life is valuable. Your happiness is valuable. Your relationship and caring is valuable. You may care about your boyfriend but if he does not care deeply and sacrificially about you then he is not helping you. And you deserve a relationship that is helping you and not hurting you. We are here for you and care about you :heart: Remember to take care of yourself because you are worth it


#4

You have something so much better now than the love any other SO could give you. You have the adoration and love of a child that thinks the world of you. That baby will grow and become the product of his environment. Do you want your son to grow up without you and become what his father is today? He needs his momma and he needs someone that will raise him and show him how to treat a woman so that he isn’t condemned to the same life his father is. You have the power to change his life and his world. You just need to love yourself enough to do it. I know ending a relationship with a child is unbearably difficult (speaking from experience) but if things don’t change the toxicity of the relationship can be more damaging than helpful to the well being of you and your child. You may be taking the hardships in life now to help your son grow in the future. Your pain is not for nothing. Its only pain until it turns into something else. It will redefine you and you will get to use it to help your son grow to be the best man you could help him to be.

I am praying for you and your families well being. Whatever you do remember this, you are not alone, do not let yourself become reclusive, talk with family or loved ones or whatever to help your heart. Your baby boy needs you, one man breaking your heart is nothing compared to the lifetime of your son wondering why you would leave him. Think about that, think about your son. You can do this, you will beat this, it will take time but this too shall pass.


#5

Hey Kimberly,

Thank you for reaching out and posting to the HeartSupport forums.

You have so much value and importance. You deserve so much love and acceptance. Open communication is SO important in a relationship. You deserve to be in a relationship in which you are able to communicate with each other, be open with each other, and love each other. You deserve to have a partner who is a great role model for your son. Don’t put your value and worth beneath someone else’s, especially if they don’t treat you well.

You said you told him last night that everybody would just be better off without you, but that’s not the truth. You are an important person in this world, you are a mother to your son. You are a human being with value and importance.
Nobody is “better off” without you. You are so loved. It is important you put yourself first. Take care.


#6

@Kimberly1419 Hold Fast. You’re loved.


#7

Hey Kim,

I cant fully relate to this experience but we did our best to offer some advice. I hope it helps you out.