I’m not feeling well today. I think it’s a UTI. I’m not able to go in to work today. I feel so bad about this. Like maybe I’m just faking so i don’t have to go to work. Maybe i should just go and stick it out anyways. I don’t know why but whenever I have to take a sick day I feel so terribly guilty. Like I’m a bad person. It feels like i can’t do anything right.
Hi Patches23,
I’m sorry you’re not feeling well today, and I’m sorry that you feel so guilty about missing work. Believe me, I feel the same way! I feel that it just goes to show how much you truly care about your obligations and duties at work. I don’t think a bad person or someone who couldn’t do anything right would feel the sense of responsibility to their work like you do, and I commend you for that.
I feel like you may be concerned regarding a persistent state of not feeling well, possibly due to an illness. Perhaps, you may feel guilty that you are making it up. I’m by no means a medical expert, but it may be helpful to seek medical care as physical ailments can have a tremendous impact on your motivation and ability to work. At least this way, you could rule out a physical ailment as a reason. Additionally, it may be possible that how you feel psychologically can trigger physical ailments as well, so reflection on your psychological state may be helpful. At the end of the day, I’m happy you have brought up this concern on the blog because its shows that you have a desire to understand the truth of what’s really going on in your body and mind.
Hope this helps!
I did go to the doctor and it is a UTI. I got medication for it. But now it feels like I’m spiraling. I keep thinking that I’m a bad person and everybody hates me because I’m useless. I’m not sure I can’t stop. I haven’t had thoughts like this for a while
Hi Patches 23,
I am thankful that you have received medical care and hopefully you feel better soon!
I understand that you feel like you are trapped in a cycle of negativity and are unable to break from it. It seems like whenever something bad happens to you, you assume that you deserved it because you think you are a bad person. But I don’t think you are a bad person. A bad person wouldn’t seek medical care to improve their health. A bad person wouldn’t be asking a stranger (me) for advice to improve their situation. You are not a bad person because you are seeking to improve your mental state. You are not useless because you have demonstrated responsibility and proactive steps to improve your health and wellbeing. What I am trying to say is that it feels like the bad things that have happened to you have provided you with an opportunity demonstrate how resourceful you are in addressing your wellbeing.
I know this will be tough for you to understand because you seem to be in a never-ending cycle of negative thoughts with no light that appears at the end of the tunnel. But if you keep searching for that light (positive attributes to yourself), you will experience an outpouring of light.
Hope this Helps!
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Hey Patches,
I completely understand the guilt of a sick day, something i struggle with myself often, but it isn’t fair to deny yourself the care you need.
If you need a break, take one; it looks to me that you are a hard worker from what you’ve said and your co-workers should be able to see that too.
I hope you remember to be nice to yourself and take care. Stay strong, you are loved and deserve any break you take. 
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