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I feel like talking about my problems just makes others sad


#1

Hey.

I have only one real friend and she’s the best friend I’ve ever had. We both struggle with self-harm and other stuff.
I always tell her to please tell me when she hurt herself, because the thought of her doing it without me knowing about it hurts me so much.
I understand when she doesn’t want to talk about it, that’s usually her way of handling it, I just ask her to let me know what happened and then I’ll try to make her feel better.
I, on the other hand, handle my problems by talking about them very much. I always want to talk about that shit going on inside my head and she’s always there for me and willing to listen.
Problem is, I feel like telling her about my self-harming just makes her sad and drags her down, even when it helps me.
Now I feel bad about that, because I don’t do what I always ask her to do. I think it’d make it even worse for her, since she has to fight a hard enough fight already without me making her sad, that’s why I stopped telling her.

I cut myself every day this week and I want to tell her, but I’m worried she might get angry or depressed, or, worse, stop telling me in the future if I admit I did not, what I always asked her to do.

What do you think I should do?
My plan at the moment is to don’t tell her about what happened this week, but do it the next time I hurt myself and everytime after that.

I would talk about it with someone else who doesn’t have to handle that kind of stuff on their own, but she’s the only one I’m close enough with to talk about it, she’s pretty much the only person I talk to regularly and is more than just an acquaintance.


#2

Hey friend thanks for reaching out!
The best i can say is as hard as it is, try and keep each other accountable. Don’t hide stuff from her. If you feel like talking to someone than i think it’s best you should. And as hard as it may seem, try to love yourself and encourage her to do the same. Your are beautifully and wonderfully made. There is so much purpose and beauty in your life waiting to unfold. Sure life is hard sometimes, but you’re strong! You are worth more than freaking gold! You are worthy of love friend. Loving yourself is hard, but maybe you both can write self appreciation/love letters to yourself together and then share what you wrote :slight_smile: Talk about what was hardest and why. Offer advice, and try to act upon it too. I know it’s hard, but it’s so worth it.
Please don’t hurt yourself, you are worth so much, instead turn to healthy ways to deal with your emotions. Work out, go for a walk or run, listen to some good music, write, draw, go a for a drive, etc.
You got this! I believe in both you and your best friend. Keep rocking!! <3


#3

I completely understand the self harm issues and I was the same way this week, i cut everyday. It can be hard to deal with but if you feel like you can talk with her then do it. If she is a really good friend especially one going through the same struggles she will be caring and understand. It’s good to let feelings out. And it’s awesome you have someone who understands you who you can go to. If you don’t feel as if you can talk to her right now there are other ways to vent your feelings like writing (journaling is great), art such as painting or drawing it helps to create things or music. We are all on heart support because we are music lovers right? Listen to your favorite band, watch concert vids, inspiring interviews or make your own music! I know that stuff helps me a lot. There are many helpful things you can do to help. Those are just a few. Hold fast we believe in you :heart: