I literally do not know what to do anymore. I wouldn’t say I’m depressed; I have never went to therapy or anything so I can’t confirm anything. I started in a new school around 5/6 months ago and I just can’t bare anything anymore, this all started a couple months before I left my old school. Travelling to school takes about an hour, only for me to be bombarded with stupid people who I hate and can’t relate with. All these stupid hoes care about is their makeup and shit and i honestly want to run them all over. These thoughts of hating people from my school first started off as a minor inconvenience but now it’s really starting to get at me. I’m British, and if you’re from British you’ll know how annoying the girls are from schools. Secondly, my interests have nothing to do with what we learn in school. I really love horses/equine, and art/animation. Now literally not even a QUARTER of school focuses on art and there is 0 topics to do with equine or animation. I just can’t see a point anymore of going, and I’m sorry if this is getting long but I’m really losing motivation to do anything right now. I’ve tried all the ‘solutions’ and stuff and there is absolutely no way I can get a therapist. My dreams are completely unrelated to anything in school and i just see school as a pointless obstacle.
Recently I have completely gave up on all homework and never barely do it. I’ve took so many quizzes and shit to try and find the main reason I’ve lost so much motivation but all of them are bullshit and never answer anything that I’m looking for. I just need some honest criticism on what I should do, my parents won’t even let me get homeschooled. And no, I don’t get bullied. I have so called ‘friends’ but I honestly dislike them all and try to keep them just as school friends. The main girl is an asshole and one of her friends has a mental disorder and an eating disorder, and she never takes the poor girl seriously. She isn’t innocent either though, she is rude to anyone who tries to give her help and is just as much as an asshole as the first girl. The rest are just sheep who follow and agree with everything they do, and I’m so fucking sick and tired of it all. The feeling of being out of place is starting to destroy me. Please help, I’m so stuck.
hi there, trust me i can 100% relate to the entire girls only caring about make up and stuff like that and the complete waste of time school is tbh especially if it’s no where near what you want to actually do. I am sorry about the parents they just want what’s best but if you haven’t talked about therapy before i highlyyyyy suggests it my parents were strong believers in the “mental health is a hoax” thing and it took years to let me but they did once i opened up to how i feel and with the animation thing and art if you can start doing stuff on the side and submit things to internships durning the summer! i hope that you know you’re loved :)) hope this helped a little
Thanks for letting it out. I hope that it was helpful to vent on here. Being surrounded by people who you don’t feel like you fit in with is horrible (I experienced that growing up and then at my last job of 5 years). All I can say is that there are people out there that will make you feel like your true self and who make you happy. Maybe you haven’t found them yet but they exist. Have you tried clubs or organizations that align more with your interests? I don’t know if they are available at your school or in your area outside of school but when I went to college, that helped me find people who I felt more comfortable around.
I’m sorry that you feel so out of place right now but you will find your close friends with time
Hi friend, first welcome to the community, I’m so glad you’re here.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this it sounds like literally EVERYTHING about school from the people, to the commute to what you are learning just downright SUCKS. When I was in school I felt a lot of the same things. Luckily, I had a few good friendships that could help me, but I did feel like what I was useless a lot of the time, so I definitely get where you are coming from.
I just want to say that even though you might not spend much time learning about art and equine in school, your passion is still valuable.
I think that one thing, that will probably be frustrating to hear, is that there needs to be a perspective shift. So you have to go to school, there is no way around that, but if you don’t do homework and fail school you will have to go longer. Are there small things (even tiny things) through the day that you can find joy in at school? Even if it’s the 25% of the time you spend doing what you like to do? Or maybe you can bring art supplies to school and work on art during lunch. If you can find joy in something it will make the whole experience easier.
Also I think you need a good community (we’d love to have you in ours). You can start by checking out our twich stream where Dan often makes art!! at twitch.tv/heartsupport.com . Even if we aren’t the community for you, I encourage you to find a place where you can grow, where there are people who can give you perspective, care and togetherness.
You might not like what I am going to say, but don’t hate those kids at your school. It’s normal to be annoyed, however, if you are going to let hatred consume you, you are going to be miserable for the rest of your life. Don’t take that path. It’s not worth it. Life is short. Forgive and release. I hope you will feel better. Thank you for sharing your story. God be with you.