I guess it’s my fault

so my brother was going to come over today to visit our mom since she really doesn’t have long to live and nobody knows if she’ll even live the next few days but he’s had covid and is still testing positive for it and my methhead sister went out into his truck without either of them wearing masks or anything so i got upset since our mom also has lung cancer so if she caught it she’d die probably instantly and i didn’t want to let my sister back in the house and then my brother eventually put his mask and gloves on to come inside but our mother didn’t want to see him for some reason and she can’t talk anymore so it’s not like she could tell us why. so my brother got pissed off and left but had to come back for my sister after i packed her a bag to go with him since she was exposed now and they ended up leaving together. then my dad starts telling me it’s my fault for everything happening the way it did and practically saying that if i just kept my mouth shut then there would’ve been no issue. he had a really angry tone with me and was telling me how nobody made a big deal about how he was working with a guy who had covid but now since my brother does it’s suddenly a big ordeal. i haven’t felt this suicidal in so long. what if my brother blames me for him not being able to see our mom again? what if my dad blames me too? what if they all end up hating me? if i didn’t exist none of this would have even been an issue. fuck man. why do i always fuck everything up?

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now my sister in law is yelling at me for sending my sister away and is blaming me for my mom not wanting to see my brother either. this is cool i guess

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Hi echo
Sorry for being so upfront but it was the first thought that came to me so here it goes…In all honesty… Fuck your dad. Covid is not a flu and if he acts like it is then he is the idiot not you. Covid killed my grandfather who survived Cancer and Leukemia. He survived both and what killed him in the end was Covid. So yeah you were right to be careful. If your mother didnt want to see your brother then that was her desicion. She made it alone because she has a mind of her own and she has her own reason for it.

Btw telling your own son that it was bad being careful around his ill mother because he somehow might have caused the desicion his mother made is stupid. Like what sane person wouldnt be careful around a sister who is a methead. Please dont blame yourself. It is not your fault. You need support not blame. I am honestly mad right now how badly you were treated. You were the good guy here. Covid is a silent killer and your dad was irresponsible. That is that.

Please take care of youself and stay safe. You are great. :slightly_smiling_face:
Bye

-Ashwell

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I was just micro-examining your post again if i had missed something or if i didnt undestand something because i didnt found any good reason why would anyone blame you for that the first time i have read it… still nothing… Maybe it is because there isnt one.

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Hi @echo
First of all can I say how dreadfully sorry I am that you are having to put up with all of this on top of coping with your Mums illness. None of this is right in any way and its heartbreaking that people that are supposed to come together and support one another at a time like this are turning on each other.
When people have such heightened emotions things often get said that shouldn’t and people get hurt that most definitely shouldn’t. I am not in any way making excuses for the things that have been said.
I agree completely with @Ashwell total irresponsibility.
The only reason I say what I say is because I genuinely do not want you to take on the guilt from what has been said. You have done nothing wrong at all. You have messed up nothing at all!!
Echo, this is your time with your Mum, im sending you all my love and best wishes.
Stay strong
Lisa :heart:

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my dad ended up apologizing and telling me it wasn’t my fault when he saw me crying. he’s been messaging his cousin who is a nurse to see what to do so that’s good aswell.

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here’s what my sister in law said to me. my issue wasn’t that he was coming with his masks but that my sister got into the car with him without either of them wearing one. who the fuck does that protect?

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AND IM NOT EVEN THE OKE WHO SAID MY BROTHER COULDNT COME INSIDE?? SHE TALKS TO ME LIKE ITS MY FAULT?? OUR MOTHER DIDNT WANT TO SEE HIM. I CANT CHANGE THAT? … ugh

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I’m very pleased and relieved that your dad apologised to you, that’s really good news. It seems like very little you can say at this point will either appease or make sense to your sister-in-law, whether that’s because she is just not understanding or looking for someone to take her upset and frustrations on I don’t know but you do not have to take that! What happens with your brother is not your responsibility. Knowing that maybe you could try not responding? If that’s an option? I can’t imagine how this is making you feel. I truly am so sorry you are dealing with all of this Echo.
Much Love stay in touch
Lisa x

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I have a brother who has diabetes. Covid is dangerous for all people but Diabates is one of the few rare instances where it just doesnt have anything in common with covid. Is you sister just trying to make you feel worse… Yes i think she does and her excuses are terrible… please dont listen to her. You did nothing wrong.

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Ok so i was wrong. It can make it worse. But not so much as an illness that targets lungs for example…

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I’m diabetic. If you’re Diabetes is unmanaged you are at increased risk of severe illness. So, keep your glucose down and keep that mask on when you’re out.

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