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Belongs to: Therapist reacts to BLACK by PearlJam
I had what I thought was my soulmate. I lost her to another. This hits me hard and I have never really recovered from our relationship.
When my head hits the pillow I dream of what we had together. It’s when I wake up I fall deep into a depression as the piece of a puzzle is lost forever.
What am I doing wrong?
Hello!
I don’t think you’re doing anything wrong at all! When you develop that kind of a bond with someone, the stronger that bond becomes, the harder it is to deal with if it breaks. There was a lasting impact they made on you. I’ve met a few people that I thought were my soulmate, but it didn’t work out for a multitude of reasons. But the one thing I did learn was that there was something I took away from each relationship, and I used that to better myself. After a while I just decided to not force it and to let it play out. I don’t think the piece of the puzzle is lost, in fact. I try to look at life not so much as a puzzle as much as I do a Rubik’s Cube. It can get messy, it can get jumbled up, and the more it gets mixed up, the harder it becomes to solve, but there are solutions. And depending on how you look at it, there can be multiple solutions. It’s all about what’s most comfortable for you.
It’s okay to grieve, it’s okay to dream. But it’s also okay to see what the future holds. Because we don’t know. Nobody does. You talking about your feelings is not a wrong step too, it’s actually a GREAT step. <3
Unfortunately, sometimes soulmates are there with us just for a period of time in our life. And it’s not time wasted even if it ended, rather we can take a look and still cherish those moments spent together and what we had learned.
It’s really hard to get over someone that meant a lot to us, especially when we thought we saw our future together, it’s heartbreaking, and it takes a lot of time to recover, it might happen slow or fast, it depends on each person how they react to it.
It feel that this break up stole your joy and left only the darkness that lead to depression, and it’s normal to feel that due to the fact that she was a big part of your life, but it won’t always be like this. When we love, there is the risk to suffer, it’s the price we pay, but also it comes with so much joy when we love and are loved in return.
You are worthy of love, and if you are willing to love again then you will find that special someone who will put those pieces of the puzzle back together.
I hope you will manage to find your way to love again, and meanwhile take care of yourself. Hold fast! -R