I hate living here

Ive been living with my mom for a month now and it’s fucking awful just got into a big fight where she pulls the “you don’t make money so don’t give advice” line and I’m so fuckin angry rn I wanna hit her but I walked away I’m abt to go talk to her and apologize but also speak my mind cuz. Its getting old I’m 22 and I’m shown no respect by her

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It sounds like your mom has a hard time taking advice. Her comment was because she was feeling defensive.

You do deserve respect, but parents often have a hard time seeing their children as grown up equals. Some times the psychological roles are maintained, such as when my dad snapped his fingers and pointed to a chair, and my brother who was in his 40’s, rushed to sit in it.

Anyway, now that you know she’s having a hard time with hearing advice, maybe just hold off on giving it. Some people rarely act on advice unless they ask for it.

It may be helpful to set a respectful tone at the start of a conversation, then maintain it, even if she doesn’t. Stay calm. Tell her, “I need to know that you respect me.” You might also let her know that her respect for you will help you gain the confidence to make your life better.

That kind of respectful assertiveness will go a long way in helping her to realize you are an adult that deserves respect.

From: I Am Reclaimer

Hey friend, sorry that you had to go through this with your mom. I know it sucks when living with your parents at 22 - been there. It’s hard to keep your head and not go crazy, but as I have gotten older I realize that it was an incredible opportunity to spend time with my family that I otherwise woldn’t have. I’m also glad you walked away and blew off some steam - while even our family can be real toxic people…they’re still family. Good luck with everything, friend.

From: RedYeti

Hi Friend, Thank you for posting and living with your mom can be difficult but you made the right choice to walk away and not have any physical altercation. It might not be the easiest to go have a conversation after a verbal argument but I feel it is best and you are doing the right thing by apologizing. Anger brings out the worst in alot of us but like you did walk away is probably the best thing you could have done.