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Belongs to: Therapist Fades to Black | Metallica
I have lived the reality of this song for going on 10 years now
I feel myself getting closer and closer to the end
I’m really sorry that you have experienced this painful feelings. To live for such a long time in this place of hopelessness where you feel lost and insignificant, can really drain you and make you even more stuck to move forward and making you feel that the end is closer.
It’s like living in an uncolored world where only black is left, where it can make you feel like all the options for getting better are non-existent, and you only want to escape this life, to not feel anymore this painful existence.
When we feel all this at once we indeed can believe that death can save us from this, but it is not true. All those suicidal thoughts being present daily and so hard to be ignored, can make it so hard to see the colors that are left behind all that black, suffocating. But sometimes we just need to search a little deeper, and we can chose how to do that, how to be saved, we need to try maybe more times.
What can really save us is to reach out for help and to find healing, there is hope and it’s not impossible to find it and to hold on to it, even if it will be a long journey and at times scary.
I have been there, where life was surrounded with hopelessness and all I wanted was to die and to escape from this pain. But slowly I started to find some colors through music, art, therapy and people I connected with, which was basically hope and I kept holding on to it, and now I can see how far I’ve made it. And you can too, it’s important to not give up.
I really hope that you will find those colors and hope to hold on to it, that will bring more light into your life.