I’m done. I’ve hit the wall. I just cant do this anymore. Im not happy and no matter what I do someone ismad at me. Im better off dead. Not sure if it would make a difference if I was here or gone. The burden of me wouldn’t be here anymore at least if I was gone.
Hey there @listlc,
Nope, nope. You are most certainly not done. Truly, my heart is breaking for you at this moment- you don’t deserve to feel this way, and whatever the situation is- we are a community that is here for you, to support you, and to care for you. It does make a difference whether you’re here or not. We care that you’re here. We need to be here with us. We care that you don’t just survive, but thrive. I believe I can empathize so much with what you’re saying. I’ve struggled with this idea of performance-based love (i.e. if I don’t do the right thing that someone wants from me, I am undeserving of their friendship or love). I know it can be so easy to fall into that way of thinking and that it feels absolutely crushing; but, so often, we are not responsible for how others respond to us, and so often, I’ve found that people are not trying to “take it out on us.” Still though, that doesn’t make it right or fair that they get mad at you instead of trying to fix their own mistakes.
Regardless, please please know that we need you here. You are not a burden. You are treasured. We love you, honestly. And you are welcome to the HeartSupport community. We love you, and we want to journey with you. You posted on the support wall, so I’m going to take it that you’re not done. You’re not giving up. If it is at all possible, I really encourage you to seek the help of a professional, or perhaps to speak with your physician about options to help and cope with the feelings you’re having. I know it can be overwhelming, even if you have access to those resources, but it’s been really helpful for my own journey, and I think it’s worth it. You’re worth it.
We love you, and welcome once again to HeartSupport. Please keep us updated.
Hey @listlc, how have you been doing since you posted? It’s been 5 days and I hope you are safe now, taking care of yourself as much as possible. It sounds like you were going through a really rough time and I’m so sorry for that. I can assure you that this world wouldn’t be better without you.
I’m sending hugs your way and am thinking of you. If you’re reading this and if that’s okay for you, please keep us updated. You are loved and cared for.
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