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I’m irrelevant

I don’t know how to explain it. I feel like the world would be a better place if I weren’t in it. If I were to die, nobody would care. They, probably, wouldn’t even notice and what’s worse is the fact that nobody knows me or even understands me or how I feel but I don’t blame them. Why would they want to know a monster like me? I’m not worth it. I’m just alone and I’m a loner. Yeah, there are times where I want some solitude because all I ever do with my life is watch anime, some stuff on Netflix, listen to music or even daydream but then there are times where I wish I had at least one friend. I see my siblings hanging out with ppl, laughing with them and having fun and I think to myself am I different in a bad way? And if yes, why? Why can’t I be normal like everybody else?? I see ppl with boyfriends or with best friends and I’m there like ‘I’m never gonna get that’. Fun fact about me… Every time I dream, I cry. It sounds weird right? It’s because I always dream of this boy and the dreams are so vivid, I can even describe him and how he looks. Whenever I dream of him, I can see myself having fun and being happy. It’s almost like I’m a completely different person. Anyway, it doesn’t matter. None of you guys, probably, even care. I’m just wasting my time talking about a load of crap that nobody even cares about. Maybe I should just leave this Earth…

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Hey, hey. Don’t go just yet. I know how the world can be such a pathetic place beyond any circumstances nor even the dreams we say we wanted to get. I mean, it seems that way but, if you look at the bright side of things. There’ll be outcomes based on your decisions. Look, I’ve been in that place before. I’ve always thought of those thoughts whenever to be seen different or insult. I didn’t even affect no more due to me caring less. I let it be that so I can toughen myself up more. However, fantasying is a opposite. I knew myself as “not fitted partner.” But, had to admit. Being the third wheel or just a loner isn’t bad if you got a friend or a pack of friends that love ya from there hearts. You know, if you need a friend to talk at most. I’ll bet you will find. Either here or standing right before you.

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Thanks. It helps knowing someone actually cares. It’s kinda surprising and I’m grateful for it. Thanks for preventing me from Cutting myself.

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Heya @Zero1 Thanks so much for posting!

I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this!

Suicide is never the answer keep holding on and don’t let go!

Love Ya

Darian Halliday/DarianDaOtter

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Hey @Zero1,

We hear you. We care about you. You’re not wasting the time of anyone here. :slight_smile:

So please, stay with us. This world wouldn’t be a better place without you. In fact, you’re making this world brighter every time you keep trying, every time you do your best.

You’re not a monster either. I like to think that we’re all made of some light and darkness at the same time. We’re just all human beings and imperfections are okay, right? :slight_smile:

You have worth. You matter. Hang in there. :heart: