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I need to vent

I feel so extremely hurt and bitter about the way a relationship ended. I’m not here to put the blame on one person, because I’m not perfect. I’ll admit sometimes I was too clingy and needy. I think it’s really unfair to lead someone on the way he did to me though. After three months of being together I guess said person realized it was a sin to date a trans girl (nevermind knowing beforehand) I feel so used because the only time he’d really talk was when it was something sexual or he wanted nudes, so I went along with it even when it made me uncomfortable. Just to hear from him. I loved him with all my heart and still do. He cheated on me twice with a friend and I forgave him TWICE. I believed he would change because he was my everything. I’m a ruin now. I’ve stopped believing in God. The whole ordeal killed my faith. Why should I believe in someone who sees me as an abomination, right? I feel worthless because all those times he told me I was valid were lies. When I begged him to stay all he said was “I’ve made my decision” no emotion. No nothing. Just that. Makes me wonder if I was just being played with. I just don’t know what to do at this point. I’m trying to stay strong for my family but I know they’re not accepting of who I am. None of that mattered when I was with the one who I thought saw me and loved for who I was. Now I have nothing and no one. How can I go on?

Thank you for having the courage to share your story and your feelings, that’s a huge step. I’m sorry for the way you were treated. You are not judged here. I believe God still loves you, I believe he made you just the way you are, and to experience what your going through for a reason. You are not an abomination. You are loved. You don’t belong with someone who treats you like that, and he does not deserve you. Be yourself and be proud of who you are, nobody can stop you from that. I hope you find love that is pure and someone that treats you with respect. Keep your head up and know that you have us to encourage your happiness.

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Thank you that really means a lot to me… I appreciate it. Making this post made me feel better. I guess it’s like writing a letter to the person in question but not sending it.

There’s endless support here and I’m glad it made you feel better. Hold your head up high, you have nothing to be ashamed of.

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