From noodlez2088: I relapsed in my terrible eating habits and sh again and I feel so guilty and so embarrassed from relapsing again again and again
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Hello Noodlez2088
I also have problems with specifically processed sugar. I binge eat it and relapse almost as often as it is put in front of me. I know one of the things that has helped me, is just not having it in my space. The problem is, sometimes family members break this rule of mine. Do you mind if I ask what things you have tried, to try to combat this habit?
noodlez2088,
That’s a tough one to overcome since we can’t just avoid eating. It’s an ongoing struggle, daily, moment by moment decisions. Try not to be so hard on yourself. One thing that helps me is to try to choose higher quality food items. I mean I started adding stredded spinach to most of the meals I cook. I can’t even taste it, but it adds nutrition which in turn gives the body what it needs which also curbs cravings for things that don’t have value.
From noodlez2088: My terrible eating habit is not eating but I’ve tried just to ignore the urge to not eat but it’s so hard because I wanna be like the other skinny girls but I can’t and I can’t get like them so I can’t so hard on myself to the point I end up passing out
Hey Noodlez,
Thank you so much for reaching out. I’m glad you are here and decided to open up about the struggles you’ve been facing. I know personally how much the temptation to be skinny and to feel better in your own body can be consuming. When I was a teenager I was stuck in a loop of thinking that if I weighed x less, I would feel more confident, be happier, have better relationships… but truth be told, it was really an illusion. Having an ideal of health can be extremely beneficial, but the diet mindset you are experiencing right now is unfortunately a trap that only leads to more and more frustration, disappointment, if not self-hate. I know you are probably already aware of this and I’m not sharing anything new for you, I just wanted to reiterate how much the other super skinny girls bodies are their own, and they don’t have to be yours in order to feel better under your own skin. The path to get there is different, slower, made of gentleness and care towards yourself - not deprivation or extreme dieting. You deserve to be your very first ally, my friend.
It’s hard though to navigate the realms of the dieting culture, and the urges of self-harm in general. There’s many triggers around us that reactivate these thoughts over and over. Through it all though, I can assure you that there is guilt or shame to feel for relapsing. It happens. Somehow, it’s also part of healing but to fall at times - even if “at times” feel like it’s happening very often. If you relapsed, it also means you HAD days, hours or weeks without hurting yourself, without giving in the urges of either dieting or hurting yourself. It means you’ve been proving to yourself that you CAN overcome these struggles, even if it takes time and repeated efforts to get to a higher sense of stability and recovery.
This shame that you’ve been feeling for relapsing don’t deserve to be present. You can absolutely push that shame away, and give yourself room to process what happened, to feel what you need, and to think about what your next step will be. Relapses don’t define you. What matters is how you get back on your feet after it happenes. You are not defeated, friend. You got this, and right now you deserve to give yourself as much love and care as you need. No shame, no blame, no self-deprecation.