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I’ve been damm near drunk every night for 18months since a breakup. My problems my insecurities my mental state and a year in prison was to much for my ex and I’ve been drowning my pain because I know it was me that made her push me away. She tried very hard but still it sucks😔
Hey there friend.
First off, I just want to say thank you for being open with us here, we appreciate it and don’t take it for granted. I believe that sharing how we feel, and what we have been through, can help others feel less alone. Once again, thank you so much for sharing your life with us here.
Breakups have gotta be so hard, it’s like you get so close to someone, you get used to how things are, and then it’s gone. I am so sorry that is something you are going through right now.
I know it may be hard to accept in this moment, but please know that things get better, it takes time and work, but I promise you it does get better. Although i do not struggle with drinking, I do know how it is to resort to bad ways of coping when feelings and thoughts get to be too much. I struggle myself with self injury, at times my thoughts get to be too much, or my emotions, and I need to do something to feel again, or I just need something to help me in the moment. In the moment it is hard to choose something healthy to make you feel better, it is easy to go to what you know. Something I have learned from my therapist is a method of waiting it out. Basically, our thoughts and emotions can only last for so long, and if we can wait out those thoughts and emotions, it is less likely that we will do that negative way of coping. It is easier said than done, but it has helped me at times in the moment.
I believe that I have pushed away many people in my life due to my insecurities and mental health struggles, it’s hard, and it’s painful. I can relate to you on a certain level. It is hard to look back and see how others were trying to help, and realize you didn’t accept the help. I have had a lot of people I was close to at times, mainly in my jobs, we would get close, and then I would kind of shut down and become distant.
It is hard to get better when you knew something and got used to something for so long. I try everyday to make myself just 1% better, it may not seem like a lot but it adds up. It is possible to break away from this addiction, it is possible to find better ways of coping that are healthy. At times we will still have bad days, or resorting to those negative ways of coping, may still happen. But when those times occur, remember how far you have come. When we relapse, or resort to negative ways of coping after a while, that is not a failure, as you have learned so much along the way.
Friend, we are here for you. You are not alone in this.
Sending love,
Lys