I ve been having trouble with keeping positive and

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I’ve been having trouble with keeping positive and focused on the future for the last month or so and feel like a failure. Thanks for sharing and giving me some perspective.

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So relatable.

It’s really hard when you have this gnawing voice in the back of your head that tells you that you’re messing it all up all the time. That whatever you do isn’t good enough. That you won’t amount to whatever you expect yourself to amount to. That you’re just…a disappointment. That’s a really hard pill to swallow. Especially when you have your daily (or multi-daily) dose of that discouragement.

And when you can’t seem to shake it…it’s uniquely eroding on your sense of resolve. It’s like it knows EXAAAACTLY how to wear you down and beat you up.

I have a similarly discouraging inner critic. And living with it can suck reeeeal hard. Just faced him today, so I guess it’s current for me too.

And when you compound that with the looming hopelessness about your future…that’s a dangerous concoction.

I think it’s particularly noble of you to share about that here because in the face of discouragement / shame and hopelessness, this is a rare act of defiance…to say I CHOOSE hope. I CHOOSE to talk about this. I CHOOSE to share, even if it could lead to more discouragement. That kind of vulnerability changes things, because it says to that inner critic - I actually am worthy of love whether you think so or not. And I agree with you. You are worthy of love. And while we’re righting the inner critic: you are not a failure. Whatever evidence it may point to, it’s not the end of your story. And you are choosing to overcome this low, and you will make it through this difficult season. And when you do, you’ll look back and see these kinds of moments as heroic turns towards a brighter chapter.

Well done.

It’s a good thing to be aware of how this season feels for you, friend, even if it might feel particularly disheartening for now. It sounds like you’ve been in a season that has been a brutal invitation for you to reflect on your life, maybe even who you are and where you’re at compared to what you would have expected previously… and as muddy and painful these seasons can be, they also hold the potential for something new to flourish.

For personal growth to unfold in unexpected ways. When you’re right in the middle of this process though, it plenty sucks and feel awfully isolating. You did well by naming it and opening up about it here. Not only you are not alone - these feelings you describe are so very relatable -, but you also don’t have to be alone while you would figure out your next steps in life. Sometimes we end up going through seasons in which we feel utterly stuck and paralyzed. With time, patience and great dose of grace for ourselves, we can learn to come out of it even stronger. It’s okay if being positive for now is difficult. It’s okay if it’s too hard to project yourself in the future at the moment. You are not meant to remain in this position for the rest of your life.

I believe in you and in your ability to take your time to see through the pain, through the helplessness and disappointment. To see beyond the lie that paints “I’m a failure” all over in your mind, that you are so, so much more and have things to be proud - regardless of how big or small these things can be. It all matters because it’s about you.

I’m rooting for you. :heart: