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Belongs to: Therapist Reacts to Daddy By Korn
I was a victim of sexual abuse when I was around the ages of 6,7 or 8, I was abused by 2 of my cousins for about a month or more while I was at my grandmothers house, I didn’t realize it was sexual assault until I told my mom that my cousins were touching me I blamed myself and constantly questioned myself cause I wouldn’t fight back I would just lay there while they did it I wouldn’t fight, scream or kick just lay there, it fucked me up so bad mentally and I hold a grudge against my grandmother cause she knew it was happening but said nothing and I was called a whore by family members cause of what happened
Thank you for being so open and honest with us. Honesty about sexual assault can be crushing. It can feel like piercing vulnerability, opening up about such a traumatic situation. I commend your bravery and the openness of your heart.
I want you to know that not a single part of this situation was your fault. You have zero blame in any of this. You were merely a child, and you could not have known the gravity of what was being done to you. Locking up is a common response called the “freeze response”. It is human nature to freeze up and disassociate when we are facing indescribable trauma. It is not your fault for lying still, and you deserve none of the blame.
No matter what your grandmother or family members say, you are not less than because of what has been done to you. You are not a whore. You are worthy of a healthy and loving relationship. You are worthy of being uplifted. You are still a beautiful, whole, and wonderfully made person. Your purpose is not diminished because of what has been done to you. Your life carries so much value. You have no blame for the past. You are so loved and cared for. I pray that you are one day able to find healing from this trauma. Opening up and sharing your story is such an important step on the path to healing and I am so proud of you for taking that step. Thank you for your story. We are always here for you if you would like to talk more about anything going on in your life. You are so loved and so appreciated.
That is such an incredibly horrible experience. No one should ever have to suffer through such horrendous actions done to them. To blame and question yourself because you didn’t fight back would be such a burden to bear. However, not fighting back does not mean you felt safe, in fact, it could be the freeze response. You may have shut down mentally because you couldn’t be present with the events. Those events do not define you. You are not the abuse done to you and I pray you find healing from this. Thank you for reaching out to HeartSupport! We are here for you and love you!
I’m sorry that you have experienced so much pain and struggle, but I’m so glad that you reached out! No child should have their innocence ripped from them, and I hope you fully understand that no part of that abuse was your fault or deserved!
If you haven’t already sought out counseling and therapy, I would encourage you to consider that. Professionals trained in dealing with trauma and abuse can be extremely valuable resources for helping us sort out, heal from, and work through those issues.
I don’t say this lightly–I’m praying for you right now that you would find the right resources and people to trust and lean on in your healing! I’m rooting for you!