I'm being forgotten and it hurts to be invisible

I cant bear looking at other people anymore. No matter who I look at they’re happy they have friends they are smiling while I’m just out of place. I’m not fitting in and I have no one. People talk back to me out of formality or even pity but no-one cares after all. Im religious and I stand to that. Don’t get me wrong that doesn’t mean I’m a homophobic idiot or that I’ll force my belief on someone else it’s just a part of me. Church became my safe place bot now I just feel forgotten. When someone pointed out good things about everyone I was forgotten. When it’s about helping out on a project or even just cooking I’m not trusted to do anything I’m just useless. I try to prove I’m worth something but I’m not enough in the end. Last weekend someone from the church group saw me cry. They are really nice and everything and they seemed to care what’s wrong but in the end telling wouldn’t have mattered. After all theyd go back into the group being happy and accepted and maybe drag me along but end up forgetting me again. I’ve had it enough. I don’t trust in these promises anymore. Promises break and I’m meant to be alone.
There’s nothing I can do about it. Everyone is so perfect and I’m just me. Talentless, clumsy meaningless me it hurts but I’m out of ideas to change anything honestly by now I feel like giving into old habits I’ve been fighting cause I deserve it and I wouldn’t feel guilty. It’s not like anyone would care.

Hey buddy.

Never feel useless and alone, because you’re not. I promise! I feel that way often, as well. Almost everyone in my family is talented (dancers, runners, and teachers) and I can often feel like a reject or an outcast; I know how it feels. But I never want you to feel like no one cares! I do! I’m here for you. Don’t walk back into your old habits and way, man, because I do that so often and let me tell you that it will only make it worse. I’m a recovering addict myself and I can say that no amount of self-medication can fix your problem. You’re not alone, you’re never alone.

I would encourage you to be honest with one person you trust in your church. I owe my life to a guy in my church who I opened up to. Was it hard? Oh my gosh, yes it was hard! But it’s worth it. Find a human you can have a one on one talk with and absolutely spill your guts. But hey, I know that process can take time. Until then, no matter how long it takes, you have me and the rest of your family here on the support wall.

Don’t give up, buddy. There’s hope, I promise.
I know because I’ve seen it myself. I personally have found freedom in God and the love He has shown me unconditionally. But I don’t want to make you discuss God if you’d rather not. Just know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, just hold fast!

Hold fast!

You Say opening up as if it’s easy but I physically can’t talk as soon as someone asks me about feelings it’s like my throat closes and nothing comes out my mind goes numb and I stay quiet and honestly? The few times I fought through that stated an opened my God damn mouth people got angry so I stay quiet. It feels like its better that way and at least no-one has to deal with my crap then

People will always leave you behind and disappoint you. Don’t put your trust or dependence on them. I’m not Christian, Yet I was raised Christian.
Put your trust & your Dependency on your God. I’m not saying don’t interact with those who are your fellows. What I’m saying is that you need to interact more with your God through prayer and his voice which is his word.
At least that is what I’ve been taught.

I believe that trying to fit in where you don’t belong is always a moot thing. Not because you do not belong, but because people that want to exile you will do just that and make you feel like you don’t belong. If you want to find a place among them then you need to make and take your place. Not expect them to recieve or invite you. I’m not saying to do anything rash. I’m saying you need to trust yourself & accept yourself. If you would do this then it won’t matter when others reject you and it would be easier for others to accept. In other words how can you expect others to accept your when you have rejected yourself?
If you try and still feel like your are unwelcomed and rejected then go somewhere else. I’m sure you’ll find your place if you keep seeking. I’m rooting for you.

Hey @Pingu I know what it’s like to be invisible and forgetten. Last year I signed up for my school’s varsity soccer team. it was fun except for the fact that no matter how much or how many times I yelled my teamates’ name they would never pass me the ball even if I was wide open. So know that your not alone here.
Hold Fast-

We noticed you, so YOU ARE NOT INVISIBLE!!!