i am so scared of death, all i know is myself and the experiences ive ever had. the thought of a nothingness sparks this almost instinctive reaction in me where my heart races and i just cant breath. i dont know what to do, if i think biologically i know that were nothing beyond just skin and bones but i want to believe in religion, i want to believe that theres something more to this, but i just cant bring myself to. i dont know what to do, ever since ive thought of this ive been constantly thinking about it and i dont even feel like myself anymore. i just feel like im finally face to face with my own mortality and i just feel so hopeless, i just feel like crumbling every second now.
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Hey, I think that everyone goes through this fear at some point in our life. Death can be scary. I was scared too. You said that you want to believe that there is something more. There is. I don’t know if these will make a change https://youtu.be/x_pGtd7zBYU https://youtu.be/T5-bwS-hrJ4 But I hope it will help a little. If you want more just tell me and I will try to help you.
Dear Luke,
Facing our own mortality can be absolutely terrifying. I’m sorry that it’s making you feel like you’re crumbling and hopeless. I used to have an uncannily similar reaction to thinking about death - with the racing heart, chills, and a kind of cold panic . But now, the only thing I’m sure of in life is that I’m not scared of death! I hope my reasoning helps you to feel the same way (:
You see, I’m not very religious either. As a Catholic, I feel like I should be but I can’t bring myself to believe in most of what is taught about the afterlife. It sounds too good to be true. But when I close my eyes and feel sunlight warm my face, or a gust of strong wind, I’m reminded that there are a lot of things in this world that we can’t explain. How far does the universe go? What is energy, and where did it come from? Those questions are beyond our comprehension, so its a conscious choice for me to put them under the messy label of “God”. I think you may be more spiritual than you are religious, and that’s valid. You don’t have to believe in cookie cutter Christian beliefs if they don’t resonate with you.
When it comes to death, no one knows if there’s an afterlife. Sure, you’ll hear stories of people who’ve seen the light on the other side, but I personally have trouble believing in anything other than emptiness after death. Accepting that death is final is key to not fearing it. If we really do leave for good when we die, that means our “me-ness”, our soul, is mortal. WE leave for good. But the coolest part of death is the same thing that scares us most about it. It’s a simple shift in perspective. After dying, if WE’RE no longer in existence, it doesn’t really matter, does it? Death doesn’t affect us at all because we’re not going to be there to worry about it. It’s the one thing no living creature can escape and there’s absolutely nothing we can do about that. It’s not a variable, BUT LIFE IS.
What you’re really scared of is how short life is. Scared that it will be over too soon. That’s why you can’t be scared of death - you want to make the most of your life while you have it and there’s no time to stress about death! I believe that people live on this Earth for as long as they need to in order to absorb all of the beauty and love that they can. Immortality would be a sorry, lonely, unfulfilling existence - it would cheapen life. That’s why death is a gift. It keeps us here just long enough to suck the marrow out of life, and then the next generation comes along and does the same thing. Everyone leaves before the best things in life get taken for granted. It’s best to avoid thinking about death until it comes knocking on your door - that way you can look back and see that your life has been well-lived.
I really hope this helps, because I don’t want anyone to fear death when it’s only purpose is to add value to our lives. I understand that my beliefs on the afterlife aren’t shared by everyone, so I apologize if I offended you at all.
-Sarah
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