I’m so tired. Tired of saying everything is fine when it’s not. Tired of hiding inside myself. Of facing anxiety and panic attacks in public, feeling embarrassed. Tired of not having support to buy my medications or pay for my psychiatric appointments. Tired of not being able to give up. I’m just so tired.
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Hey Mary, man it certainly is disheartening and exhausting feeling like you just want to find rest for your mind and body. Waking up every morning and not knowing what the day is going to bring, not knowing if you’re going to have an anxious meltdown, not knowing if something is going to set off an avalanche inside your mind and body.
I really do hear you, Mary. Some days I wish I could just melt out of existence and some days the only way I can find that is just sleeping the day away. Sometimes it can feel like Groundhog Day the way we can dread what lies ahead, even if it’s the same routine stuff.
I just want to validate the way you are feeling right now, but also encourage you that you are not alone. Sometimes knowing you have someone on your side can feel like a little reprieve. Someone who says “I get it and it fucking sucks”. Someone who sees you in the chaos and hears you above the roar.
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Hi Mary,
I think Maneiko is spot on. I’m also so very tired. There is a sense of validation when I hear others who struggle with the same thing. Sometimes I feel like a zombie. I manage it ok as long as long as the peaks aren’t to high or the valleys to low. Much easier said than done.
You’re more than welcome to reach out if you ever just need to vent.