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It’s really hard to talk when the people I trusted most consistently hold my issues over my head and remind me of how horrible of a person my battles make me to everyone else. Even when I celebrate my growth, they show me where I’m failing. It’s like there’s no point to trying at all lol
I think it really sucks that the people who you trust do that to you. I don’t know if I would place my trust in people who don’t see me and support me. I have a very stigmatized disorder and it really bothers me when I see stuff on social media about how much of a monster I am. I makes me feel like I am one, ya know? I think it’s important to realize that your growing is your own journey and it’s all for you. There isn’t one person in this whole world who hasn’t experienced failure or who hasn’t struggled in some way with mental health in their life. I would encourage you to be proud of yourself and your progress because that’s really all that matters. YOU matter.
Hi! I agree with @Mystrose. I wouldn’t try to have a trust relationship with people who don’t see and support you. I also know what it’s like to have those closest to you get anxious or upset with me when I’m having trouble with my bipolar symptoms. My husband used to pull out a cigarette and tell me to take my pills. I told him I wasn’t going to medicate myself over his anxiety. (I am no longer married to this man!)
We all struggle with negative thoughts about ourselves. You don’t need people adding to that burden. But of course you know that. You wrote:
That’s really crappy but you can use it to leverage a huge leap in your healing and growth. Make a determination that you’re making strides in your life just for you, and not to win approval from anyone else. As much as we all want those closest to us to do and say things that help and don’t hurt, they really don’t get what we’re going through. They can’t really, because they have never been in your shoes. The person we most need to understand and support us is - US. WE need to get it. WE need to be the person who understands our pain. You’re perfectly poised to make that leap, and in recognizing your own growth, you’re almost there.
Funny thing is, once I myself made that leap people started coming into my life who knew how to give strong, unconditional love. I now have a handful of real friends who know that they don’t know what I’m going through, and don’t throw out dumb “advice” that hurts more than it helps. They just stand with me as friends, and in prayer. Sometimes it’s necessary to let go of toxic people to make room for healthy and loving people.
Anyway, I think you’re on the edge of making real progress. Keep going!
everyone has their own struggles, their own journey, their own battles. to see someone grow is one of
the most beautiful things to witness, to overcome that and showing your strength.
when you are seeing your own progress, they should support in every kind of way to make you feel comfortable, because you absolutely deserve that. you should be proud of yourself. feel hugged my friend,
Greetings
First convey how important it is to not make others feel helpless. When someone feels helpless it’s hard to function or do daily activities. Then tell them specifically what they’re doing that makes you feel helpless.