Ive been having suicidal thoughts and I feel like giving up

Honestly. I feel so bad. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m about ready to say screw it and give up. I want to kill myself. My holiday break has been awful. I’ve wasted it away by laying in bed almost every day. Ive gotten depressed again to the point I don’t want to eat. I’m staying up till three and four in the morning held captive by my thoughts and it’s hard to talk to people since its the holidays. The pain is so bad. I just don’t want to live anymore. I really- my main friends I have are internet friends and they are such a blessing and I don’t want to hurt them by hurting myself but ive started thinking maybe they would just forget me. They would move on I’m not that great of a person. I don’t know though… I’m so scared I don’t want to die. I’m terrified. I just want someone to wrap their arms around me and tell me it will be okay but I’m afraid it wont be okay. I don’t actually want to die I just want the pain to go away. I feel so stuck in this pit. I also don’t feel like I can go through another semester of school, its too stressful I cant handle it. I cant handle anything anymore… I have a few things to look forward tp this year I’m going to a Twenty One Pilots concert in June I’m trying to keep myself focused on that to keep myself alive but its so far away and I feel so cold. so numb… last night I was up even thinking of ways to hurt myself. Ive lost myself and feel too broken to be fixed. I need help, I cant do this.
edit: I just wrote a suicide note… I don’t know what to do I’m scared. I need help .


@cs15 I believe in you. You’re a fighter, don’t ever forget that. Your wings may be broken, but I don’t believe your claws are.
“Suicide doesn’t end the chances of your life getting worse. Suicide eliminates the possibility of it ever getting better.”
Live another night. And the night after that, and keep on going. Don’t let Tyler & Josh down. They would want to see your smiling face in the crowd. Your Internet friends won’t forget you, they care about you. If you think they are such a blessing, they probably think the same of you. You never really know how much you mean to a person, so don’t underestimate yourself. I see a strong fighter who still has hope. Live to see the moon each night, find a hobby to immerse yourself in. Don’t let your heart die because of devils sadness. Post on here to talk anytime you want, night or day, end of the world or not. You are not alone. Know that seeing someone else on here who is just as messed up means more than you know.
Don’t give up <3

When They Call My Name - Black Veil Brides

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Hugs Thank you so much for saying that.

@cs15 You are worth it.

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I may not be much of a help, but you matter. This community loves you. We may not be with you physically to give you hugs, however, our support and compassion can remind you we do care. Thank you sharing. God be with you.