I've just cut myself again

Just like you read it, I’ve just cut myself again and, to be honest, I kinda missed it.
I’m too much of a coward to commit suicide, I guess I’ll have to keep cutting until I can finally find courage to end this shit.

Hold on mate, it gets better.
Stay strong, keep focussed on what brings you joy and the positive things in your life. Don’t take this as a failure!
The great thing is, you reached out here, meaning you want to get better.
You just need to take each day as it comes, some days will beat you down, while others will lift you up. The important part is to reach out to those who you trust and who care about you. They can provide strength in dark times.
Focus on the things that bring you joy, reach out when things get tough and I promise, things will improve for you.

@fuecris14 you didn’t miss cutting, you miss the break it gave you from your thoughts.

Have you looked into ReWrite? It’s a resource HeartSupport released for self harm and could be really beneficial to you. Being unable to commit suicide isn’t cowardly. It takes a strong person to stay alive when they feel like it’s impossible. Keep reaching out - whenever you have the urge reach out to the community, I know you’re in the discord, use the real talk channel. Message someone you trust, just get yourself through that urge.

Hold Fast

Hey friend,
I myself recently relapsed after 2 years clean of self harm. I am currently a month clean but the urges are unbelievable.

I understand that how hard it is to have these thoughts constantly swamping you feeling like you can’t get out of this rut. I would like to make an agreement if I continue to stay clean maybe you can stay clean to and we can get through this together.

You are not alone friend. I know right now this is an easy way out, a quick escape. But let’s say that you do get through this and you are left with the scars that come with this, how will you explain that to your kids or future friends/spouse.
It’s just a thought.

Hold fast friend,
Luna :heart:

Why do you need courage to end it? Why not find the courage to live? Also why do you cut yourself. Is it because you feel like you need to be punished? I’m not a cutter, I use to be a burner though. THe reason I burned myself is because at the time I was empty and dead inside. I burned myself so I could feel something. I couldn’t tell anymore if I was awake or asleep. Both somehow felt the same. So I would burn myself to figure out if I was awake and still breathing.

Also Do you believe that taking your life ends the pain, suffering and struggle you feel when you live? I mean most people attribute deep sleep to be similar to Death. So they conclude that it all stops once you die. Yet nobody can really prove it ends after you die. What if it is just a phase and after you die it comes back and continues anyways? Then you put effort in dying to escape something that stayed anyways.

I admit maybe my perspective needs work or has flaws, but I figure if I try to escape something that I’m not sure I can escape from that all that effort is a waste. So my conclusion is if I got to struggle, suffer and cope then I might as well find something useful to put that effort into. So if dying is a waste I might as well try living.