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Journal/ Might be losing my job

Due to covid everyone at my job needs to get vaccinated by oct 5th. I’m been vaccinated since April and I’m for getting more people vaccinated. If they don’t, they lose thier job.

However, I’m stress cuase there a Gmail that they gave us. My doesn’t work( cuase I’m dumb with technology.) Also the school is run by a bunch idiots that have no communications. I try to ask for help, but I still have not gotten straighten out. It should be simple, but I can’t figure it out and even old people figure it out.But I can’t and just get so fucking anger.

I feel even if I do the right thing, get vaccinated, work overtime, work from 6:30 till 8pm, they just fuck me over and they are trying to fire me.

Getting dark thoughts that would make me act impulsively and could put me in prison. Or commit suicide.

I just want a basic life, to move out my parents and just be okay cleaning bathroom. But I even can’t have that and it just not fair. Like fuck, I know I’m not perfect, but at least just trying live a humble life and get by.

Again, I believe in vaccines and they are best way to beat covid, but I think people should lose thier jobs over this.


The first priority is to get the vaccine.

If the device that you’re using is portable, bring it to the person who wants you to have access to the account, and let them figure it out.

Be patient with yourself, just as you would be with others. A great many people have difficulty with technology. Everyone has their own learning style, and you have yet to find out what works best for you. I flunked math every year until I dropped out in the ninth grade. When I went back to school I needed special attention and remedial math, but I made it through. That’s when I found out I had ADD and dyslexia.

Living a humble life is a worthy goal, in fact, it may be one of the most noble ones.

Is there evidence that someone wants to fire you, or is it just a feeling?

Dark thoughts cannot “make” you act impulsively. Dark thoughts can be troubling, but the action that you take or don’t take is a conscious decision. In truth, no one can make us angry. Even if it happens before we realize it, our reaction is a choice. We can choose to laugh, cry, or even empathize with the person who behaved badly. Remember, you own your impulses, they do not own you.


Hey @Metalskater1990,

I’m so sorry that you’re feeling so much pressure right now. Though I’d like to encourage you to take it easy, and to try not to let your thoughts wander too much. Catastrophizing can be a pretty destructive trap and prevent you from doing the things that might actually help you.

This Gmail thing is very frustrating to you right now, but it’s a practical obstacle that you can overcome by asking for help. You can get the humble life you want. You just need to get a bit of help for this specifically. You are not stupid for not being able to do something. I personally can be extremely patient with people, but technology…? When it’s working it’s amazing but when it’s not, or when we don’t know how to do something, it’s super frustrating!

Feel free to let us know about the issue you’re facing, by the way. We might be able to help or guide you through practical steps, peacefully. Many of us are familiar with gmail and used to it here.

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