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From shairivkah: Lately my anxiety has gotten worse since I received devastating news about my father getting an Alzheimer’s diagnosis. I didn’t deal with it well at first but have been trying to lean on God more and started doing art again which has been helping.
Alzheimers disease can be something that is very scary for family to go through! To see changes in someone you know so deeply can be something that causes heartache.
I’m really glad to hear you’ve re connected with things that help ground you.
Maybe your art can be something that keeps you connected with your dad as he goes through the stages of alzheimers.
There will always be a favourite type of music and little things that will continue to bring him joy, and that’s important to hold onto.
I hope that since the diagnosis you’re feeling a little better and have been able to have a chat with your dad and maybe even with the dr about what to expect and what direction to go down in time
It’s really scary and difficult to see someone you love being affected by Alzheimer disease. This slow distance that it creates between them and you, the fears and worries regarding how fast things are going to change, and just how you can handle it over time… it makes completely sense that you had a hard time with learning it and processing the news at first. This diagnosis represents a lot of fears and question marks at the same time while we wish to share life with the people we love, for as long as possible. Feeling like your anxiety has been more intense ever since you’ve learned about it is truly understandable. It’s a shock in itself.
So glad though that both your connection to God and practicing your own creativity have been places of comfort to you. There are outlets and connections that certainly help to feel less alone while we walk through life’s unexpected challenges. I know that for me art has been such a wonderful tool to deal with anxiety - regardless of what (re)activates it. It just gives you this space where you can be yourself, and intentionally reconnect with the present moment… not away from the worries or even the anxiety, but at least having a time to let it exist without consuming us from the inside. May you keep relying on these as much as your loved ones moving forward.
I also hope that the moments you’ll get to share with your father from now on will be full of joy and life for the both of you - beyond the grief and sorrow that the disease can bring at times in your heart. Even with Alzheimer, your dad will always be your dad, and the love you have for each other will not be diminished because of it. It may even grow stronger in face of this shared adversity. In any case, hoping that you can cherish those moments together and keep feeling mutually seen. There is beauty in walking on the same journey as the ones we love, even when this journey feels disheartening because of the lingering ghosts of loss.
Wishing you all the best, as well as to your dad. Him and you deserve the world.