Someone told me the other day that while I may feel tempted to carry my scars and say to myself, “I survived this,” that would actually be holding onto the stuff that I survived.
It was so overwhelming. I got lost in the middle of it. Now that good people have helped me out of those dark woods, I must keep looking forward.
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Hi Eckspee,
thank you for sharing.
why must keep looking forward ? there is no must in that.
the saying “i survived this” or “keep going” these days, is much more difficult then it was ever before in my eyes.
the world has become so fast, everything seems to be so much, we have to deal with so many informations day after
day, more and also faster. expectations in life are higher , you have to be the best with everything you do and on and on.
after all of that, what matters is you.
we are not supposed to carry the weight of life alone, and when people help you with it, they do it, because they care.
treat others like you want to be treated, be grateful for those people in your life, because they help you because of
you. they care for you, as you for them.
that is why we should be here for, why we are living with each other on this planet. life is overwhelming, life is often too much to handle for all of us. for me too. if i would not have certain people in life, where would i be ? i never know.
i would not be here today, in my acutal mood and status. i would rather not figure out where.
you do great, what you have to do is live, take care of you more in the upcoming time for yourself. you matter most ! 
you are loved and feel hugged
Imagine that you carried a ten gallon bucket of water ten miles. No imagine you’re no longer carrying it. It’s safe to report that you carried the water, even though you aren’t presently doing so. As you carried the water, you learned something about the process and how you felt about it. Retaining what you learned about it is holding on to the stuff that’s gained wisdom, and prepares you to avoid carrying the water again if you don’t want to.
Every time you survive something, acknowledging it is a positive reinforcement of your strength, confidence and resourcefulness, even if help was required to survive. When future challenges manifest, you can tell yourself that your prior survival provides evidence that you can again.
Letting go of the pain is a good thing. You don’t need to hold on to that. Instead, hold on to the truth that you’ve gained experience, wisdom and strength.
You do need to keep looking forward. You need to forgive and release the pain from the past, but bring your hard won survival tools with you.
Thank you both for responding, but I feel very taken aback.
I intended to declare that I feel ready to let more of the past go such that I can travel more lightly.
Maybe I’ve misunderstood one or both of your posts, but getting told how to do that when I’m already working on it - or even getting told not to do so - feels less than supportive.
I’ve made this decision for me.
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Hi Friend!
I really love to see progress posts like this! I have been on a mission to let go of some of my past trauma as well. Your post is very encouraging. I heard something not long ago about grief that really helped me. Your post reminded me of that. It was something along the lines of grief being like a shell that we have to wear for a time but when we’re ready we can put it down. Thank you so much for posting this here! I hope that you continue to move forward in your journey. And please keep us updated on your progress. I love to see it!
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I’ve made this decision for me.
And the decision is entirely yours, always. You know this community is full of people with a big heart, but misunderstandings can happen, especially through written messages. I personally read everything, and believe that the point of all messages here is just to bring a bit of nuance to what the person you mentioned in your first post said to you. Depending on where we are on our personal journey, and what feels meaningful to us personally, the meaning of your relative’s statement can be interpreted and perceived differently.
For example: for a long time I was SO upset whenever someone would say “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. Or even more: that it’s what I went through that made me stronger. Which is not true. I made myself stronger, regardless of the nature of those traumas. What I didn’t see at the time though, is that this way to perceive things is mine. And for others, healing equals defining themselves in reaction to their traumas. Ultimately, all of this is about how we place ourselves in the world and painful experiences in our story. All ways to heal are valid, as long as they resonate deeply with our heart, our intuition, our whole being.
You feel aligned with your needs, and THAT is very strong, very inspiring. I4m glad you’ve decided to share about it.
It makes sense to feel not supported when other perspectives are brought up though, especially when it’s a progress post – which implies that you’re already on that road, confident with your heart and your decisions, which is awesome! I’m sorry that posting has brought up negative feelings. You know everyone’s intentions are right here. Sometimes it’s just not easy to communciate through written words.
When it comes to freeing ourselves from our past traumas, there’s truly no wrong or right way to move forward or to simply live. I’m proud of you for being confident in your healing. Those are major steps on your path. You’re not defined by your experiences. You get to define who you are. 
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I hope you feel safe and that you feel proud of yourself for dealing with your scars.
I know I sometimes forget that I hold that power to allow myself to let it go in order to heal. So thank you for that reminder. It can be so difficult, but so powerful.
I really appreciate the time you take to open up and to share these moments with us.
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