From shaggyhere2283: So I’m 25 and been having a roller coaster ride of feelings. I’ve been really overwhelmed and I don’t know how to respond. I’ve been trying to keep my relationship together, but it seems like she don’t care. She don’t want to talk or spend time with me. Can’t give me a real reason why she has brought up divorce the second time. Nothing I do seems enough. I can’t even take care of my own kids with out her cutting me off and doing it her self. She keeps sending me mixed signals then I see a post about divorce. Which was brought to my attention by relatives. They were asking if things were alright and I asked why. Which led me to see post. I’ve been suicidal lately and just been trying to keep my mind off things.
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Hi Friend, Thank you for posting and for having the courage to share your feelings here with us. It is so hard to know there is a problem and yet not really know why, how or the wherefores of it, it is even more upsetting to have someone mention the ending of a situation without even attemting to contemplate fixing any broken parts, It is no wonder you feel as you do. You both could really do with having a proper sit down conversation away from the children, somewhere where you cannot be interrupted and you can both speak honestly and openly to one another, That way you can learn what the issues are and decide if and how you want to fix them as a couple. The way you are at present is in no mans land so you are concocting theories in your mind of what and how and they are never going to be good outcomes as sadly we always manage to think negatively and you are worried. Remember knowledge is power. Please talk to your wife. I wish you and your family well. Lisa. x
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Hi shaggyhere2283,
Sounds like quite a difficult situation to be in - I can totally understand being overwhelmed, especially when being unsure as to what is happening in your relationship. I think that should be the first thing to try and address - to try and get answers as to where things are at. I can’t say what that would lead to, but I think that simply having an idea of what the situation is actually like (whether that be divorce, or finding solutions together to your issues), would help point you in the right direction. As you mentioned, I know that your partner may not be the most open to discussing things, but finding a way to get rid of the ambiguity (even if it results in unpleasant answers) would be a way of determining where to put your efforts. In the meantime, the fact that your relatives reached out to check up on you seems very caring!! Perhaps they could be people you can turn to as you navigate this situation - you shouldn’t have to deal with all of this on your own!
With all of this in mind, I want to say that I’m sorry that you’re experiencing all of this so early on in life! However, there is the upside that there is so much ahead of you, and that no matter how overwhelming things may be at the moment, there is plenty of time for things to clear up and the beauty of life to find its way back to you. Times will change, and even the darkest of moments will end up giving way to something new. I think that especially when things are as hectic and uncertain as they seem to be for you at the moment, simply trying to remind yourself that it won’t last forever can be of great help. I wish you all the best, and we are here for you whenever you need to talk about anything:)