The company I work for is currently a sinking ship. I’m trying to find work I’ll be passionate about in the gaming industry but I’m losing hope.
Gah, that sucks man…to feel like you’ve poured so much time and energy into a ship that’s going down…to literally watch your passion and talents get so flippantly poured down the drain…it’s a brutal place to be on top of the fear of not being able to find another job that matches your passion and that makes you feel excited about life/ work / like your time/energy actually matter. Plus, the more time passes, the more hope vanishes, because you hoped that it’d be easier to find, but by now, it gets harder and harder to get motivated, the fear of rejection increases with every passing day, and the fear of being exposed as inadequate increases…that you won’t be able to find another spot on a non-sinking ship because you are the cause of the leak, or the expendable one…
There’s so much that stirs within your heart in times of transition – especially related to your career…I’m sorry you’re in the midst of that storm, friend. I remember watching my company sink and feeling so desperate to hop on to a lifeboat and get the hell off as quickly as possible…I started thinking about my wife, my kid, and all that I was trying to rescue from the oncoming storm…it is a tumultuous time, especially as you scramble for some sense of substitute security.
Thanks for opening up here – it’s really hard to admit that that process invokes fear or hopelessness, and I’m thankful and honored by your courage.
-Nate