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Belongs to: Therapist grieves with Slipknot - XIX
my father passed away suddenly 2 years ago in June… on my birthday… and i was listening to this song almost on repeat… and every time i hear it i get on the verge of hysterically crying…
Hi Friend, I am so sorry for your loss and to lose your Dad on your Birthday is even harder I am sure. I hope you have been able to grieve with support and love from family and friends.
It’s strange how music can bring out every emotion in us and I hope that with these tears that fall for your dad, in time they will come with a smile along with all the wonderful memories that you had rather than just the sadness of grief.
I wish you well and we are always here if you need to reach out. Be kind to yourself. Lisa. x
I am so sorry for you loss, friend. You must have been so close to your dad, and the love you have for him is truly felt through your words here.
Two years can feel like a very short time but also very long time when you are grieving someone who is so important to you. In the midst of grief, our perception of time can really feel like we’re carrying an unwanted burden on our shoulders. The more time goes on and the more hurtful it feels like there is a distance growing between you and the person you lost. Then the perception of the time that has passed, and the brutality of the pain of the loss make you feel like it all happened just yesterday, and you would be meant to relive the pain over and over.
I imagine how these two years must have been so very painful for you. Hopefully the tears you had while watching this video could bring a little bit of relief to your heart. Of course, it doesn’t erase the pain, it doesn’t take away the memories either… but you absolutely deserve to just let your emotions out as what you are facing goes beyond words. You deserve to share your voice and express how you feel, regardless of if it is sadness, anger or any other emotion. You are allowed to be and let it all out.
It feels without a doubt that there is before and after, and the after feels particularly doomed. It must be hard to navigate the moment when your birthday approaches in June as it has also become something that triggers this pain inside of you. I personally lost my big brother the day of my brother-in-law’s birthday, and it really feels like a very conflicting date now. On the one hand there is the willingness for celebration from others and to keep embracing he joy that life could offer. But at the same time, it feels almost forbidden to smile or have the possibility to be somewhat happy when in the back of your mind there is this voice that reminds you that this is also the day when you lost someone so close to your heart.
I hope that, one year after another, and at your own pace, your birthday will become an opportunity for you to keep embracing the love and care that people in your life have for you, while also honoring the memory of your dad in ways that feel right and meaningful for you. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, and you are more than allowed to feel the way you do right now. I’m sending much hugs your way, friend. Thinking of your dad and you today.
-Micro