Hello everyone.
It’s been regrettable since I posted.
Life is not going good at all.
I’ve been unable to be happy, feeling either sad or angry that I’m sad. I really don’t know how to get help. Not only that, but I’ve really suffered a lot, specially when it comes to intrusive thoughts.
I can’t stop thinking about how I’m failing for sure, and that I should end my life here and now. I can’t stop feeling lonely, either.
I just… Don’t know what to do anymore. Please help.
Hey. I’m so sorry to hear that life isn’t going well for you.
You’re not failing. In fact, it’s an accomplishment that you’re here, okay? Not everyone has made it this far in life, and you have. So you’re not failing, be proud of that. Be proud that you’re alive and that you were brave enough to tell random people on the internet about your personal struggles.
I get the being angry that your sad. I’m angry all the time, and I know it’s not a good feeling. You feel like you’re just causing everyone pain and you’re a terrible person. But I promise you that you are loved. You are doing so good. But you have to let go of the anger. Have you tried a rage room?
If you don’t think that will help, and if you don’t want to go to therapy, try journaling. It’s difficult to start, but it can help sort out your feelings. If neither of these will help or you don’t want to attempt either, that’s perfectly okay. Baby steps, right? Try something you usually don’t tomorrow. And please don’t end your life. I know it’s really hard right now, but your life matters so much and the world is a better place with you in it. The world isn’t done with you yet so please don’t.
Hallo Naaro,
Thank you for being here and thank you for sharing. I see that you’ve been experiencing these feelings and this hurt for a while now. Intrusive thoughts are so unsettling when they just come from nowhere aren’t they? Sometimes it feels like the more we try to push them away the more they persist.
Life stressors, mental health difficulties or just plain day to day life can bring on these thoughts and you’ve identified it for what it is. Just a thought.
That doesn’t minimise the impact that it has on you or how frustrating it is to stop them.
I think the hardest part of it all comes to not judging ourselves by what these thoughts tell us. Especially when it’s constant and persistent. It does feel isolating and it does feel like every person who has ever known us must also think these things about us.
The fact is that these thoughts aren’t depicting of our true selves or of the selves perceived by others. Thank goodness we don’t have control over how other see us, because chances are it’s much nice and kinder than what we treat ourselves.
You mentioned in your last post that you had been working with a professional, is that something that is still happening and has it made managing these intrusive thoughts any easier?
Not really, sadly, she (my therapist) can only help me tell where these emotions come from, not to direct them in any way.