Why does feeling alone feel so bad? It sucks when you are there for others and don’t get the same in return. This past two months have shown me so much. I’ve been there for ppl with all of the energy that I had left, but I barely got a Happy Birthday, hell my own mother forgot. I feel so invisible, do I even matter?? I wonder how everyone would feel if I disappeared. Doubt they would even notice. I just wanna go far away and find inner peace!!!
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It’s hard. We put so much importance on what other people think. I do it too. It’s a trite answer to say that inner peace is inside and you don’t need to go away to find it, but it is what I try to tell myself. You are there for people, from what you’re saying, and that shows that you’re a good person. Your importance isn’t a commodity for others to judge - it just is. You are important. I’m sorry you aren’t seeing your efforts reciprocated in the way you need.
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Shanelle,
Loneliness is difficult to deal with. I’ve struggled for most my life with the feeling of being alone. The last few months have been tough but today in particular has been an extremely challenging day. My heart aches for you. You are on the right path though, looking for inner peace. The video below helped put loneliness in perspective for me and has helped remedy my struggles. I hope it does the same for you.
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Hey @Shanelle,
This world wouldn’t be better without you. You’re making a difference by being you, whether you give a lot to others or not. I hear your pain though, and this frustration for feeling like you’re invisible. And I’m so sorry you’ve been in this position. It’s really hard to face this feeling of being invisible, unnoticed, forgotten. But as deep as this feeling can be, it doesn’t change anything about the fact that you matter. There could be a lot of explainations behind this situation, a lot of subtelties in the way you and your loved ones communicate. But ultimately, nothing, absolutely nothing would question your worth and importance in this world.
The thought “I give a lot to them and they don’t reciprocate” can be very hurtful. But those two things (giving/receiving) are not necessarily tied to each other, and how someone shows their love can be very different from one individual to another. Sometimes we can also have expectations but we don’t really say it, while if our loved ones knew they’d do their best to be present. I know it hurts to feel left alone, especially through an important event like your birthday. Maybe there is a possibility here to invite your loved ones to adjust your relationship, by explaining to them, in a calm and collected way, that you’re hurting - and why? I believe a dialogue can be initiated in this kind of moment. Just because there might be reasons behind this - and this reason is not you. 
In any case, you are not invisible. We see you here. You matter. And your are loved.
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