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Belongs to: Therapist Comes Undone by Korn
Razor blades is crazy, my off plan is jumping from a high spot. I think the sensation of flying would be a nice off
I’m super concern with you jumping off. Not sure what happen in your life to be in this situation. You can fight this tough battle in your life. It might be hard to think for many reasons to live. Just remember I here to support during your best and worse days in your life.
Hey friend. Thank you so much for sharing this here. From a stranger on the internet: I do hope wholeheartedly that you will choose to stay with us. That you will give your heart the time it needs to see the light that exists on the other side of this painful time, and in this very life.
I have personally been dealing with suicidal thoughts throughout my life, on and off, and have expressed at times what you have shared here, at least with the same spirit… These moments when you reach the point of not caring anymore, for the pain you have to deal with is just too much. Too overwhelming, too deep, too confusing and controlling altogether. So much that it seems to invade every fiber of your being, every minute that you are awake and aware of it.
It makes sense to feel and think about death as a way to free ourselves from this pain. To see it as the most efficient way to just say stop and not feel anything anymore. Still, giving in to death is also removing the possibility to experience what life still has to offer you. And man, if something that pushing through and seeking support during these dark seasons taught me, it is that it is worth it to keep trying. That WE are worth it. It is for those very moments, like having the chance to connect with you on this giant platform online, that make it worth it to push through the darkness.
But it doesn’t have to be done just on your own. If it wasn’t for opening up and allowing people to be in my world when I was in deep pain, I wouldn’t have known moments of beauty I couldn’t imagine at the time. Life takes many shapes, it evolves, it changes, it can surprise us positively, as long as wee keep giving it time. You my friend, deserve so much to offer yourself this precious gift. You deserve to let people in and walk alongside you. You don’t have to carry what haunts you and what causes you this pain just on your own. There are people who care out there. We care about you here.
Death does not deserve you, my friend. There is so much more to this life, even if it’s hard to see it in the moment. Even if it’s hard to believe and have hope again. There is more. You deserve to have the possibility to see it with your own eyes. 