I’m going through a situation where, as i’m typing this i’m still shocked, sad, angry and yet confused and thinking how stupid this is typing this but I was seeing a girl for 6 months and never not once did i think i would fall in love due to my past and yet, here i am absolutely crushed the fact that she left me because she would focus only on my negative’s and because she wish’s that my skin “was darker”. i’m glad she acknowledged that that’s her personal problem is that she always focus’s on the negative on everybody not just me. but why do i feel like i lost a huge piece of me? just thinking about the fact that i no longer would get a text message from her or a call or just the image of seeing herself with somebody else is giving me such bad anxiety to the point i’m having a hard time catching my breath.
What you just shared isn’t stupid. It is what you’re experiencing, how you feel. It is about you so it is important in itself. I’m glad you posted this and I hope it helped a little, at least at the moment you wrote this.
Indeed it sounds that you really care for this person and I am sorry she left you. Even though she justified this with reasons that seemed related to you, it is true that it wasn’t about you. I’m glad she was aware of that and told you so. It was about her, her choices and certainly the way she perceives love itself.
How you feel right now makes sense. It’s totally understandable.
but why do i feel like i lost a huge piece of me?
I think you just described grief and I can relate to that feeling in many ways. There was different moments in my life when I felt this way very acutely. It is something we all go through in our lives. You can feel like this for any loss you experience in your life, whether it’s relationships, events, opportunities, changes, even material things. And it is always related to the importance the person or thing you lost has to you. I know it’s hard, it really is. It’s like you’ve been in a privileged “circle” with someone and now you have to handle by yourself all the feelings, memories, thoughts, images that you shared with them.
You did something important by reaching out and sharing. It is important to have a place where you can let this out of your chest. And I know it will sound like a platitude but time really helps. As human beings we need time to process, to grieve and heal. Hurting is, unfortunately, quite normal. But it won’t be like this forever. It’s like facing a giant puzzle with separate pieces that are reminders to what we’ve lost. But you’ll manage to go through this. Piece by piece. Progressively. And you have friends here in this community to remind you that you’re gonna be okay.
Try to take some deep breaths. Cry, scream if you need it. That’s okay.
I’m with you wholeheartedly. You are not alone.
It’s okay to feel this way and it’s normal. There are different forms of grief and when a relationship ends it’s understandable to mourn that loss. It’s challenging when we have strong feelings or love the person and it ends and it does hurt because you share those moments together so it does feel like a part of you is lost. Taking time for you to grieve, to process, and allowing yourself to feel is important. It’s okay if you’re not feeling okay right now. Do your best to be kind to yourself. Cry if you need to, try journaling about how you’re feeling, try practicing your breathing, or something as simple as going for a walk can help a little. It sounds cliche, but with time it will get better. Hold fast. You’re not alone. <3
Damn, you gotta realize that’s not in any way your fault. Yes, it hurts, I know, but it too will fade with time. The pain and the memory will always be there, but with time, it wont hurt as much and you WILL be okay. A “part” of you is gone, because you put her before yourself, that says so much about you as a person. Think about this… okay? If you loved the wrong person so much, how much more love and happiness will you give the RIGHT person?