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Self image / overthinking / I’m poser / why do I think like this

Two days ago my sister boyfriend ask if I have to choose my favorite record of all time. While thinking, it was possible to pick one, some many artist , genre , and just I honestly don’t think I have one. But I said queensryhce operation mindcrime. We both a agree that was great record. But I had other pick, like my guilty please of Metalcore record XD!

Today thinking about my music taste, I literally think goes insane thinking about. I think I’m kinda like a poser cause I care what other people think of me. Bring judge by the gate keeper and wear shirt of band I don’t listen much I use too ( even thou I still like them).

But it like for example I have lions lions tank, I still wear it but I haven’t listen in ages. However, I still think they good band, but haven’t listen them always. Such as I consider Guns n Rose song awesome, but I hear them too many time so I don’t listen as much. It like I’m so attach to image of being a metal skater, but thier obviously more too me. I know I would be the same person if I listen to hip pop. Sorry I don’t if I’m making sense, i have hard time putting it in words.

Like all my metal bands shirts, I still think the bands are classic, but I haven’t listen some them in years. Not because I don’t like them, I need listen to other music and find new things. But I get nervous like, if someone confront me by let say wear my lion lion saying can you name a song, I would be lost for words. ( even thou I tell you the genre they are like pop punk/ hardcore) then they think I’m poser.

I’m overthinking, I get upset people think I’m fake because I’m not fake. I’m passion about my music , but I get worry of being judge by it. However, this literally was in my head all day long. It crazy that I care too much of what other people think of me.

In reality I know I’m not a poser, I think it also fact that starting to see my image is constantly change. I’m not same person as I was in high school. Which it is a good thing that I’m changing.

I need stop overthinking this.


You have an absolute legal right to like whatever music you want! For the most part, the only posers are people who accuse others of being posers. I like music from all eras and genres. I like Louis Armstrong, Glenn Miller, Pink Floyd, BB King, Sinead O’Connor, Classical music, Korean music, boogie woogie, and the list goes on. Am I a poser? If I am, my investment in the role is extensive enough to authenticate me.

Music is best enjoyed when consciously absorbing it, not just thinking about it. So, just enjoy what you enjoy. Have fun! If you do want to spend time reading or learning something, try playing Mozart in the background. It’ll help with concentration and memory.


Hi Friend My favorite album is operation mindcrime too lol. I saw it in concert and it was really awesome. I think you should be who you want to be and like whatever music you want. I like lots of different types of music and I could care less if someone laughs if they see me listening to something from the 70s on Spotify. I don’t think your worth should dependent on whether or not you can name songs from a band. ~Mystrose


From: SuchBlue

Hi MetalSkater1990,

You might have a specific set of songs that you listen to a lot, you might be a fan of a band or artist or genre, but to like a genre you don’t have to know every song in it. Others’ opinion shouldn’t affect yours negatively, it definitely doesn’t make you a “poser”. People can think of you as fake or not fake, at the end of the day is that you have music that you enjoy and listen to. Names of songs do not define if you’re a good person or not. :hrtlegolove:


From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hey Friend, I am going to keep this a short but loving reply to you, you listen to the music you want to listen to, you wear the clothes you want to wear. NO ONE has the right to tell you if you are right or wrong and if they do, turn around and walk away as they are no one you need to worry about. You are loved and you matter. xx


From: Dark Weeb 666 (Matt)

Hi Metalskater1990. Dont worry I completely understand what you mean. However i think some of your concers are a bit far fetched. First of all wear what you like! Just because you cant name three songs at the moment doesnt mean you are a poser it just means you cant name three songs at the moment. I like BFM. But I have heard Tears Dont Fall and Betrayl so many times it has just lost its magic for me and thats just something that happends. Another example. I think Tool are talented musicians. Do I listen to them a lot? No. Am I a fan of their sound? No. But I can still tell they are very talented. Calling someone a poser is kind of pathetic. Like what do you about me to call me a poser. What it comes down to is how much you let the opinions of random strangers influence you. You are not a poser. You know what you like and thats enough :slightly_smiling_face:


From: Micro

Hey friend,

You know, we’re all posers in some way, because no noe will ever fit perfectly to everyone else’s standards. And that’s okay. When Lisa was reading your post during our SWAT meeting, I was thinking about when I was a student. For a long time I have acquired and kept classical books of the field I was studying (anthropology). I felt kind of proud to think that I was starting to collect these. But the more I would see them, the more I would feel guilty. Because I didn’t read them! And for sure: they were quite old, dense and difficult to read for most. Nothing to compare with more recent publications that were about topics that I was more focused on and interested by. All in all, it made me felt like a fraud to others, but in reality I was betraying myself. The issue was that I felt like I HAD to have those books and have read them to be a good student, or someone worthy of what I was learning. Which was absolutely wrong! The same applies to you, friend. Your tastes are yours! And even if there will always be “classics” identified in any genre or creative field, there is absolutely no obligation to be a living encyclopedia to have the right to have an interest for something. This is about what you like. So, maybe it’s time to consider wearing shirts of bands YOU enjoy, and not the ones you think you should be wearing…? That way, when someone asks you what you like about the band shown on your shirt, you will have the possibility to have amazing and passionate conversations with others!

Be your authentic self, friend. The social pressure around tastes and personal interests doesn’t need to be present. Enjoy what you like. Be who you are. And if you like wearing the shirt of a classic band you never listened to, then you also have the right to enjoy it because you think it’s a nice one! No one gets to judge your tastes. Your identity is yours. :hrtlegolove:


From: sea__kay

Hey Metalskater1990, that sounds like there’s so much going on in your head. It’s great that you came here to write it down. I hope it’s been a bit of a relief for you and that you’re not tortured that much anymore by these thoughts. I understand worrying about other people’s opinions a lot and being so hard about yourself because of that. It’s always okay to change your taste in music and what you wear. There’s absolutely nothing wrong when this changes over time, because there is never anything wrong with who you are and what you like and it’s okay to express this. You’re valued and loved, and you’re just right.


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