Shedding my skin (family boundaries)

I’m changing my boundaries

I’ve been in college for the past three months and I’m actually starting to understand what everyone has been saying about finding yourself.

I’ve been so uncomfortable around how close my family is to my college life. Like having your dad and aunt always on your instagram when your adding new friends and people

When your dad and aunt dont even know your gay

Its unsettling

Ive been so obsessed with social media- and been crushed under the weight of family excpectations

So I blocked my family that follows me and told them I got hacked and accidentally deleted my account

I’m not proud of lying but it’s literally driving me nuts

Like I love my family but I need fucking space

I also just met my crush from bumble yesterday and he’s just simply wonderful! I’m not gonna rush I just want to be friends.

For the most part I just need to be the main character of my story

Covid, Religon, Predators have all taken things from me

I need to put myself first this time with no online dependance. No fake sense of self.

I want to live. I don’t want to feel like I can’t be myself around everyone.

I hope I’m not being selfish but I literally don’t feel comfortable coming out until I feel like I have a safe space of friends I’m around all the time.

I don’t feel comfortable that people I meet for the first time can stumble easily on my dad. That triggers trauma in me.

I also hope I’m not going manic I don’t think so though I just think I feel like taking a big step in fixing myself

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You are absolutely right to move ahead with your independence and surround yourself with people who appreciate and support you. If your instinct tells you not to “come out” to your family, you are doing the right thing by not coming out to them.

You don’t need to feel bad about blocking your family, if they are interfering with the very important process of emerging as an authentic individual, and forming relationships that are comfortable, and help you grow.

You need to be the main character of your story. No one else can live your life for you.

Congratulations for asserting your independence.