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Belongs to: What brokenness are you struggling with right now?
@SLNTPLNT @heartsupport struggling with my dad being palliative and in the hospital losing his capacity live independently due to his progressive disease. I’m broken and I don’t want to be left behind 
Feeling broken and left behind is what happens when you are facing such a profound loss. The pain is very strong evidence of the love you have for each other. He is fortunate that you are there for him. I hope someone is there for you. May every minute you share with each other the blessed.
Hey friend, checking in - how are you doing?
Oh friend, I’m so very sorry that you are going through this. It must be incredibly painful to see your dad being affected by this disease, having his abilities being reduced progressively, and composing with the perspective of being left behind. Words are not enough to fully describe the hurt it creates to assist someone we love when it feels like they are slowly fading away. You want to be present, support and help as much as possible, but you are also constantly reminded of the potential for loss and grief.
I’ve been in this position when my brother was sick. It was hard to know that he was more and more affected by his disease, and that we couldn’t do anything to stop it. At the time, I lived away - in a different country -, and even though we communicated very often together, I missed the possibility to be present with him before he was fully unconscious. It’s hard to be forced in this witness position, as it brings all kinds of feelings of helplessness. I hope that, somehow, you could embrace those times with your dad - whether he is fully able to communicate with you or not. Your presence has been making without any doubt a massive difference into his life. You have been bringing genuine love, care, and attention to him. There is no disease, no health condition, no distance could it be physical or spiritual, that would ever take that away from him.
I’m thinking of you today and hope you manage to take time for yourself, to take care of your heart in the midst of this situation. That you can cultivate patience, grace, and welcoming all the emotions that may arise, for as long as you need. Much love to you. <3