Lately, I’ve been feeling super down, with senior year setting in, having to make a decision about my entire life’s course, and consistently feeling like I’m
(broken text)
leads to them dumping their problems on to me. With every one so busy, it feels like I’ve got nobody to talk to. I feel very alone and scared right now.
Gosh, yeah, senior year can have SO MUCH WEIGHT to it…to feel like your ENTIRE LIFE is riding on the decisions that you make today…to feel like there’s nothing you can do to ensure you’re making the right one, to feel like you’re fighting against these invisible rubrics and have no idea how to score well…to feel like there are so many unknown variables…to feel like you’re trying to figure yourself out in the process and still have no bloody clue who you are…and then to feel like you have a deadline to figure it all out by application deadlines coming up in November (depending on which schools you apply to)…it’s just so much freaking pressure, it feels like you’d rather run away than be crushed under the weight of this seemingly impossible task. I remember the weight all too well, friend…I was so scared to make the wrong decision, because I felt like one wrong move would forever alter the course of my life off track and that I’d never be able to recover. Now a decade out of high school, I can safely say: you’re okay to fail. Honestly, I could have literally never plotted the direction my life took, and thank GOD…because where I ended up is way better than where I planned to go…the failures in my life turned into blessings, and all that I was afraid of feels so small now. You’re going to turn out okay, friend. Everything’s going to be alright. Try not to focus on doing the “right” thing and focus on the best decision you can make from this viewpoint and surrender the rest to God if you believe in Him or to fate. Everything’s going to be okay 
-Nate