So stressed out, and burned out

I know this probably sounds stupid… but I need to vent somewhere.

I am so stressed out by life. I feel like I’m drowning at times. I have a great family, job, etc. but I am still struggling. I ended up relapsing with self harm a couple weeks ago. I am clean right now but all I do is think about negative stuff and yes, sometimes, cutting. It is really beginning to wear me down and also frustrate me. I KNOW what all I have (all the blessings in my life basically), but sometimes I just feel like I’m undeserving of any of it. I feel like a “bad” this, that, and whatever else - all the time. For a long time I was free of self harm and I was happy. I was really enjoying life. I don’t know how I got back to this. My significant other is great but for some reason I don’t ever open up the way I should. I don’t even talk to my best friend about it anymore. I feel like I’m burdening people around me. It’s so difficult to stay afloat… why do I do this to myself??? I thought I had this thing beat… instead, I’m stuck in the same gear again… going through the motions and not really living life.

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Ben_Solo remember you are always welcomed to vent here!

Seriously I will be praying for you and thinking about you. Be honest with the people around you. It is okay to be honest and vulnerable. The people we surround ourself and love always will return the same love when you are honest. I understand feeling you are stuck in like a field of mud but friend their are people ready to help you get out.

Tell your loved ones they will always be there for you when you are hurting and needing it.

Keep us updated!

-Morgan

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Dear Solo,

Hey bro, thanks for coming here and expressing yourself. You will always be welcome and loved here. Concerning your situation, I am so sorry you are struggling with negative thoughts-- it can be an addiction in and of itself. My best friend deals with the same thing and it can be detrimental to your wellbeing.
Just know that you can be honest with your wife and best friend. I guarantee they want to be there to support you, block out the negative illusions that you are a burden. I believe that you could actually grow closer to them as you make yourself vulnerable to them.
Stay strong brother. We are here for you.

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Hi Ben,

Its ok my friend, you are free to vent here, we are here for you :slightly_smiling_face:

I´m sorry you are struggling with those thought, but try to remember what really made you happy and made you enjoy life, sometimes we forget that! Why do we fight? Why do we live? Why do we love? I don’t know about self harm… But, I know you are too strong to stop it! and try to talk with you wife and best friend, I know they will help you so much as much as you can imagine because they love you bro :slight_smile:

Stay strong, a big hug my friend!

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I want to sincerely thank you all for taking time to read and reply.

It really means so much getting encouragement. I think somehow I’ve allowed myself to not be the confident business person and internally get upset by things I have no control over. Then I don’t express myself. I guess it really is super important to LET IT OUT, I’ve seem to forgotten that.

I’ve been really low lately and I keep thinking but no matter what else there is my kid. I have to be around and healthy and a great example if for no other reason. I have to build some resilience and figure a way.

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Hey @Ben_Solo,

Thank you so much for reaching out! It sounds like you’re going through a LOT of stress - what you’re feeling is completely normal. You’ve mentioned that you’re stressed with life (anxiety) but do you also struggle with a form of depression? Sometimes they go hand-in-hand. Please make sure you separate feelings from facts. For example, you said that you feel like a burden - this doesn’t mean you are a burden. Speak truth over yourself; you’re valuable and people love you! Talking with other people about your personal issues helps you feel a lot better too - I would strongly suggest working on feeling comfortable enough to talk to your wife/best friend about your struggles, or perhaps a licensed counselor. I’ve been seeing one and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Hold fast! We care about you!

-Eric