Thanks taylor i think almost every reaction you re

[HeartSupport_Fans]

This is a topic from YOUTUBE. Reply as normal, and we will post it to the user on YouTube.

Belongs to: Therapist rates the Prequel by Falling In Reserve
Thanks Taylor…I think.
Almost every reaction you record speeks to me in terms of mental health. Your interpretation of the lyrics seem to relate to some of the very challenges I have been facing.
You keep mentioning “The Imposter Syndrome” and I find myself reflecting back to my life experiences and when evaluating my self esteem or worthiness, I invariably fall into the questioning mind…“Do I deserve this _____ ?” Have I done anything that anyone else couldn’t have done? Do I really belong here? Why do I feel like an imposter?
And any minute, someone is going to expose me as an imposter.
It’s really uncomfortable. Waiting for the “other shoe to drop”. I never feel safe and I know it’s irrational. But I’ve never felt worthy of praise and I know it’s because I’m still waiting for my (step)dad to appreciate me. To be proud of me. And some of the $hit he’s done recently feels like he’s INTENTIONALLY trying to hurt me. To place me beyond arm’s length.
Every time I view your reactions, it feels like it’s “tailored” (see what I did there?) to me to be therapeutic.
Love your reactions and think you’re stunningly beautiful, exceptionally bright and intuitive.

[Gregor1an]

Haha - I do see what you did there! Nice work!

Your post speaks to me because my wife struggles with the imposter syndrome as well. I don’t think she’s ever identified something like you have with your stepfather though. Her stepfather has been the one that rasied her from the age of 2.5, and he’s great! Her birth father is in her life, but he’s always been just a bit different in how he approaches his relationship. It’s been very “formal”. He would pick her up when she was younger on a Saturday, go to lunch, go to a movie, and drop her back off. That has kinda continued into adulthood and she turns 40 this year.

So your experience makes me wonder if part of her imposter syndrome is from her birth dad, similar to you but the other way around. Anyway - I can definitely understand how and why you would feel that way! I’m not sure about your situation, how old you are, etc. If you’re still living in the house with the stepfather, that makes things exorbitantly more challenging!

I agree with your comments about Taylor - her insight into song lyrics often makes me think of things in a whole different light. That said, from my perspective, YOU are also bright and intuitive. To have the emotional IQ that you have to sorta grasp and understand the situation you’re in to the level you do…that takes a lot of self-awareness, maturity, empathy, etc. You 100% should be proud of yourself for that!

When I put myself in your shoes, it feels like I would either try to “stop” feeling those feelings of imposter syndrome -OR- I would try to stop allowing the stepfather to have power over my feelings. I think both are enormously easier said than done, especially from an outsider’s perspective. I could be wrong, but I feel like maybe there’s a little bit of human nature working against you here. You know how we could have 99 good things happen to us, said about us, etc. but it only takes 1 bad thing to really set our mindset back? It feels kinda like that to some degree. I’m guessing you have hundreds or thousands of good things, blessings, etc. everyday that you maybe overlook or don’t realize are significant. But that one negative thing sends you into a spiral.

It’s very hard to break out of that negative self-talk! Something that helps me sleep at night, though, is knowing that I’ve done everything I could that day to be a caring, open, helpful person to my fellow humans. If you treat him fairly, yet he still treats you poorly, I think you should be proud of yourself for doing the right thing, and try to not let him have power over you recognizing and acknowledging that.

I wish you the best, and keep at it with the puns and/or dad jokes - that one was great!!

[PlatformReply]

I know nothing about you or your step dad, but for what it is worth…your step dad could have a reason for pushing you away. Could be his own insecurity and damage. Could be you simply misunderstanding if you’re a young teen. I hate to say it as a 34 year old who was raised by a couple of different step dads…but it may be a thing you won’t understand until later about him. Don’t bring weight to a relationship that you don’t need to because all it does is make it harder on both of you. Step back and be objective.

If he’s a confrontational type of guy towards you, obviously none of the above applies. Your situation is yours. I still say, unless he’s doing true objective wrong, don’t judge the man until you’re older and have some perspective. I’d kill for my dad who adopted me and one of my step dads…a couple of the other step dads, not so much. But it took me reaching my 20s to reach that level of appreciation for them. I had no idea that some of the delayed gratification was to teach me that the reward isn’t the pat on the back, but the feeling of accomplishment for having strived towards something and achieving. That in itself is the prize. Being noticed and praised by others isn’t necessary but nice, and achieving for others is empty if you don’t appreciate your own success for you.