This is a topic from YOUTUBE. Reply as normal, and we will post it to the user on YouTube.
Belongs to: Therapist Reacts to Falling in Reverse Popular Monster
The thing I am struggling most about right now is losing my mom. She died a week ago… wow… I didn’t realize how much has passed since then… and it’s so hard to breathe… I wake up and life doesn’t feel real because she’s not here, I truly never imagined a life without her in it and now I have to. I try to stay strong for my daughter and husband but sometimes, I just want to break and stay broken. It’s hard to shower, get dressed, I have to stay busy though or my mind goes to “I miss my mom.” I am very angry at the world, god (who she believed in and I don’t but still how could he let someone who is amazing, beautiful, the kindest soul… die… why her). Everything I do reminds me of things I did with her and my siblings growing up… realizing I will never get to make new ones with her… I’m 25… I still need my mom and I don’t get to have her and I’m scared… I’m so scared. She believed in me when I couldn’t, she didn’t judge me for my mental illnesses… my self harm… she loved me no matter what and now… she’s gone… HeartSupport.
Also great reaction! You should check out more of their stuff, even his solo stuff!
A week can feel like an instant and an eternity at the same time. You’ve described that feeling so well. My sincere condolences, friend.
Loss and grief have a way to wrap themselves around absolutely everything in our life. From the moment you wake up to the moment you try to fall asleep, it keeps following you like an unwanted shadow. But not one that would remain invisible to the eyes - actually, it feels so heavy that it just keeps weighing on you over and over. Right now, you are in this acute transition of trying to just process what happened. The reality of it. Your mind is all over the place and feels all the contradictions it creates - of both wanting to keep going as it was before, while also feeling the need to slow down for a bit. Sometimes your mind will make you feel as if you realize that your mom is gone for the very first time, while you’ll know deep inside and rationally that it’s not the first time you realize it.
It’s okay if you need to stay busy. It’s also okay if you need to break. It’s also okay to alternat ebetween those states. There is no shame in the way you would try to cope with the feelings that arise. Tears will come unexpectedly, and sometimes it’s just too hard to keep them in. At other moments it feels “better” to keep your mind busy. In any case, it’s okay to give yourself space and to feel what needs to be felt. You are not weak. You wouldn’t be failing the ones you love. The reality you are facing freaking hurts, and you are trying what you can to navigate through it. It feels unreal yet too real at the same time. Your anger, your fears, your pain - it all makes sense.
Give your heart as much time as it needs. Losing someone so close to you makes it so difficult to stay connected to the world around you, because there are deep emotions within that need to be felt and expressed. One day at a time, my friend. Take time to breathe, to cry, to talk to people about how you feel. It’s okay. You are not expected to be anything but human right now. There is strength in your vulnerability.
