I slip this into every playlist I make or share with my wife. It’s the closest way to encapsulate how much I love her. A life without her wouldn’t be a life.
Very much enjoying your comments, especially as you are a youthful study in psychotherapy (from my POV, anyway as I’m 56 yrs). Very refreshing. I was 21 yrs or so when this came out and it (and PJ in general) changed the geometry of my thinking profoundly as a young man who had just gone through the EXACT. SAME. THING. It took years (and I’m still coping) to deal with. But, really? I think it’s the oldest story in the book and a good one, maybe one of the best. Prepare for loss. Gird yourself for it as it will come. An existential guarantee, actually, outside of fable and story telling. We are going to “lose every thing” at some point (at least I hope most do simply as the reward is so valuable once processed). And as with my own case? 25 yrs later and I’m still processing. It is not easy, letting things go black … in my case, I’m not there yet … but I’m so much further along than I was 20 years ago. Talk about a slow roll towards sanity/grief and the acceptance of it as normal and healthy …
And pardon my blowing up your wall but I’m a poet/writer/singer and just can’t stop once a thread begins … but I think Naomi Shihab Nye’s poem “Kindess” is even more succinct … certainly more sympathetic in a way that I think best expressed in the feminine vs the masculine point of view … both speaking of the same cautionary tale, that one should be prepared to lose things … but Naomi presents it (again, what I consider more “maternal”) in that her entire message is that the loss is necessary for growth …
Before you know what kindness really is
you must lose things,
feel the future dissolve in a moment
like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand,
what you counted and carefully saved,
all this must go so you know
how desolate the landscape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride
thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.
Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness
you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho
lies dead by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone
who journeyed through the night with plans
and the simple breath that kept him alive.
Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.
Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes
and sends you out into the day to gaze at bread,
only kindness that raises its head
from the crowd of the world to say
It is I you have been looking for,
and then goes with you everywhere
like a shadow or a friend.
Some wonderful insight and commentary for such a powerful song. Thank you. Looking forward to you analyzing Jeremy, music video version. Steel yourself first. Your discussion of the topics in it will be helpful to many, I’m sure.
Love this song. Have since it came out. And I still feel it. Brings a tear to my eye every time I listen to this (as well as Release from the same album)
So good.
And that right there is the absolute definition and showmanship of a TRUE ARTIST.
I was with my daughters’ mother for 7 years. 6 years ago she left me and our daughters for someone else and we haven’t seen her since. I can’t IMAGINE ever being with anyone else ever again. Talk about black, for years, I was far beyond black. Still not fully recovered. I spiraled into a pit of despair and for months there was just a constant dialog in my mind, a battle “should I end it?” “No you can’t, what about the kids?” Over and over and over. I literally sobbed day and night for months nonstop. I’ll never know how i got through that stage. I developed panic attacks and debilitating depression. Eventually i got counseling, tried every antidepressant available pretty much til i got on cymbalta and I finally am starting to have a bit of motivation to do things i long forgot that I liked like playing guitar and painting, etc. but for a solid 5 years, I lost interest in everything. Just went through the motions, feeling completely HOPELESS. I put on a smile for my kids and went to work, took care of my kids and watched YouTube every spare moment. I still miss her so much. 
I still have reoccurring dreams of when we were in the hospital when she was in labor and laying in the bed with our newborns cuddling. The dreams of our past haunt me. That said, after getting on the right meds and ALOT of counseling, life is much better today
I cried …
Great reaction to this epic live performance. Loved it. Thanks.
I lost everything b😮I fucked upoopsie
You need to hear government mule" separate reality" song it’s amazing
This song contains a decent summary of why I don’t take walks outside anymore
My wife cheated on me after 10 years and after we had a child together. My heart was torn to pieces and can longer trust. This song is my anthem.
My favorite Pearl Jam song.
Hi, i like to say, very good interpretation. Lovei it. I am in a same situation right now. thank you.
Trying not to kill myself.,.
Damned in Black!..
Ah, Black. I’d say it is the platinum standard of songs about lost love. I’d still prefer album version, though
Yeah it is about broken heart.
She was the center of her universe. The sun gone bad.