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Belongs to: Therapist and Vocalist react to One By Metallica
This person had no reason for hope. Why do all my therapists and doctors try to make me reframe my situation as something that can be okay? I spent two years learning that I am always going to be disabled and that I need to accept this. I had to accept the limitations of medical treatment in order to even get approved for the procedures. At first I cried all the time when I was told that I won’t be able to have a normal life. But eventually I worked through my pain, and I think that there are things worth living for that I still can achieve. But when nurses and therapists tell me to aim higher and to be more optimistic then it just makes me so aware of what I can’t won’t ever have and I am so frustrated. Sometimes they make me think for a few hours that I can actually do something that I have given up on, but then later I realize that I never will be able to, and it is like I have to grieve this particular loss all over again. And that’s when I get suicidal. I think other people and mental/health-care-workers are struggling with their own emotions about how much pain I am in, and they want to tell me that it isn’t really as bad as I think it is, or that some miracle will come along. I really just want my medical procedures and I wish I didn’t have to constantly relive my pain in therapy sessions. I love this video, sometimes I feel relief by watching horrible things and having some sort of sympathetic catharsis. I watch videos about genocide, and videos about monks/nuns in Asia who have lit themselves on fire to death as forms of protest because of how sad they are about their lives. I wish more people would just let me accept that I am never going to be okay, but these surgeries can give me something worth living for. If you read through all this very long comment, then thanks for reading this
Hi @HeartSupport_Fans,
Your post was super interesting for me to read. All medical professionals wanted to make sure that you aren’t sad & alone fighting a difficult medical condition. They don’t want to do a medical surgery that is risky. You should have the right to do surgery if you are comfortable. My doctor told me that my medical condition was incurable. I just told myself to stop complaining and focus on living the best of my life. I may be in pain but I always remain positive. I always see a weakness as something to learn. You can fail and make mistakes everyday and that’s normal.
I think you are talking about the Vietnamese monk on fire. My grandparents grew up during the Vietnam War. I actually showed that monk picture to my grandma. The most crazy thing is that my grandma didn’t know that. During the Vietnam War, my grandma lived in the capital and she was enjoying life. Yes, she knew there was a war but it didn’t affect her area as much.
My family is Buddhist but I’m an atheist. I grew up going to the Buddhist temple all the time. A monk told me that Buddha had to suffer and gave up everything in his life in order to reach nirvana. For me, I think suffering is the journey of life. You don’t need to live Buddha’s lifestyle. Suffering is what makes us human beings. Life can be challenging at times but we try to remain positive. There is no such thing as life can’t be peace eternity. Disaster is always going to come at us and we got to push it through.
@@HeartSupport
That is cool that you know about Buddhism. My mom was half-Buddhist, and I saw the Dalai Lama a few times in person.
I’m transgender, and I was in college when they hate-crimed tortured Mathew Shepphard for being LGBT; and I didn’t hear about it at the time, but apparently it got a lot of news coverage. Reality is just mysterious sometimes.
When the news covered the death of Nex Benedict last month in March, it reminded me of previous high profile hate-crimes and so I watched old news coverage on YouTube about Mathew Shephard; and my mind thought “what was I doing in the late 90’s that somehow so necessary heard about it?” Life is mysterious.
There’s a big culture war over trans people but it never gets news coverage; I don’t understand why. I think this must be how the average person ends up doing nothing about horrible stuff, they just don’t really know about it.
It’s why those books like “uncle Tim’s cabin” and the “adventures of huckleberry Finn” were such a big deal. Somehow northerners were in some kind of denial about how bad slaves were treated or something like that.
I learned something new from you about the culture war of trans. 100% support trans. That’s crazy. There is always going to be hate crime of any race or gender or ethnicity. I respect everyone no matter what you are. Why hate something that doesn’t affect you at all? A person needs to look at the mirror and tell themselves: Is it waste of time to hate or criticize something? Some days I don’t understand people that criticized everything if someone doesn’t agree with them.
Hate is such a strong and powerful word. I don’t hate anyone but try to figure out why they behave a certain way. You don’t have to agree with their views and choices that they make.