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Belongs to: Therapist reacts to Schism by Tool
This song was very current when my marriage split up. I tried honestly but she refused to try to understand me and that in tern made less likely to do the same with her. I very sure I got married for all the wrong reasons, and am willing to take the blame yet that didn’t help. It just poured fuel to the Blame game. As of now my Kids are adults and I honestly never knew them since they were 4 & 7. My family told me they are sure she has prisoned them against me when at one time my then mother in law said I was a better parent to them than she was. That is milk long spoiled. At the age of 63 I wish MANY things had been different. So I take one day at a time changing what I can, and try to accept what I can’t change.
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Hi @HeartSupport_Fans,
I hope you are feeling better after the marriage split up. It must have been hard for you. Marriages aren’t always perfect as media displayed. There will be conflict with your marriage. It’s never too late to change something in your life. I feel like you made the right decision to split your partner. If your wife makes you miserable, there is no reason to stay in a relationship. You would like a wonderful person than your wife from what you post.
No shame on divorce, my grandmother was in her 30-40s when she got divorced. She was thrilled and her life got much better. In Asia, my culture shamed people for divorcing. You do what makes you happy. I totally agree taking tiny steps to change your life. Also, I loved you accepted your life the way it is. The best you can do is to live in the present.
I hope you are able to see your children. That’s wrong for your wife to not allow you to see your children. She was jealous for that incident. The children must see their dad as an adult. They are desperate to know what their father was like. Your children hate or love you as a father. You did the best you can to support your children even if they don’t know.
@@HeartSupport_Fans It WOULD be great and uplifting for me to see them again and possibly be part of their lives. My daughter was such a daddies girl growing up, but I loved them both and spent equal time with them after my son was born once he was old enough to be included. I’m in a situation now where after uprooting my life to take care of my elderly parents both being in very bad health in their early 90’s dad 93 with dementia and mom mostly just in bad health. Dad passed away March 9 and mom gave up and passed a wk and a day later. The nursing staff that looked in on them said I did a good job in my caring for them but I have those self doubts about was there something more I could have done being non-clinical. My only living sibling is trying to take what money my folks left me (not a lot) away because she is that way. I have a GF that always wants $$ all the time so it’s time for me to make another change in my life. 
. Thank you for your kind words and I share many Asian ways of looking at life in general.
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