I’m having suicidal thoughts. I’m thinking “Is anything (like schoolwork and the future) worth it?” I was also removed from a fake friend group for being “annoying” and nobody told me how I was being annoying. Somebody then went to harass me in my discord dm’s. I have a small friend group at school but I’m afraid the same thing will happen with them. All but one person in my family are emotionally abusive towards me. This has been going on for 8 years, and I just want it to stop. There is a small part of me that still wants to keep living, and most of my mind has become suicidal. I’m talking about it with my real online friends, but I feel like I should stop doing that, it only puts more pressure on them.
You can talk about it here as much as you want. You will find the most real online friends here, who are able to handle what you want to talk about.
I think you should take a break from your online activities for a little while, then start over with a different group. Keep in mind, they really don’t know you, and a lot of them are insincere.
The relationship with your family is messed up, with established dysfunctional patterns. You might not be able to change that, but it may help if you can find a counselor or therapist to talk with you about it.
Take good care of your friendship with you school group. You probably have a good instinct regarding how much you should discuss with them. Sometimes good friends will distance themselves if a subject comes up that’s too emotionally heavy for them to deal with.
Stay in touch here, so we know how you’re doing.
From: I Am Reclaimer
Hey Friend, sounds like you’re going through a serious transitional moment in your life with "friends and friends. I’m sorry that you’re going through something like this as I’ve gone through bullying when I was younger in the same way. My “freinds” that I grew up with became the very ones to tell me to go kill my self, among other things. Just like you, everything in my body told me that nothing was worth it, that offing myself was the best way out of the situation… but this is what I learned. those people who are actually your friends will be there for you. I’m 30 now and my actual friends are still my friends. It’s also really hard to deal with people who just harras you and it can make you feel absolutely worthless. My family, like yours, were emotionally abusive to me as well. But what I came to understand is that they had my best interest in mind and just wanted to see me prevail against the “evil” that was in the form of my bullies. What I can say with certanty is that if you can see THERE IS light at the end of the tunnel, these experiences will help you become the person that life needs you to be. I’ve learned that life, god, the universe, puts challenges like this in our life to prepare us for what our true purpose is. You’re not alone and there are a lot of people, a lot of GREAT people (Elon Musk, Oprah Winfrey, Einstein) that have gone through these kinds of traumatic experiences. Thing is, we remember their names and not the haters. Good luck, friend. You can make it to the sunrise. Our Last Night - "Sunrise" (OFFICIAL) - YouTube
From: Aces MCL36M
Hallos! Honestly, I have been in your same shoes, I’ve not really had any friends IRL in my school. But personally, I take that as an advantage as I get better education when i’m in school. When coming suicidal Only last week-ish I tried to take my own life as I wasn’t happy and stil not. The bestt advice that I can give to you at the moment is to keep your head up think positive keep doing your daily routine: E.g having a shower , waking up at a reasonable time etc it does make you feel alot more productive. Meditaion helps alot when clearing your mind. You’ve got this <3
I’m actually happy that I saw this post. I can’t tell you how much I relate to all of this. When I was in school, I was living with an emotionally abusive father and stepmother and was constantly bullied by my “friends” and told I was annoying. I lost a lot of them in my life and they always made me seem like the problem. I felt like it was true but looking back on those people now, I feel nothing but sympathy for them. They are the same bad people they were back then. Just remember that YOU are not the problem.
When it comes to the suicidal ideation, I know about that all too well. Just know that you are meant to be here, no matter how it may feel sometimes.
From: Dark Weeb 666 (Matt)
Hi Rezu. Welcome to heartsupport. I can relato to how you are feeling. These “friends” you had were not really your friends. They were just people who didnt really care about you. There was a person that betrayed me and hurt me in way. Not phisicaly but he still did and in the end he got into jail and I am a free person. Those people may feel good about themselves now but they are shitty people. You are stronger then them. You can grow from this. You are much better then your people. We are here for you whenever you need support