To leave or not to leave

So by the title you can probably guess that things suck. Again.

My mom is blaming HS for something that to me is a blessing. She hates HS so much that she wants me to have nothing to with this community or anyone related to HS. This hurts. This community has been a part of my life for over 3 years now. You guys keep me going when everything falls apart. I dont want to leave.

On top of that, I went searching for mental health resources in my area and found some BUT…get this…they only help those with government insurances. Not private insurance. I unfortunately am one of the many with private insurance who are now left without mental health help. Here, HS, is my only means of help currently.

So now im stuck. To stay means to defy my mom’s direct orders and risk losing internet, phone, and who knows what else she could use against me. But to go means to lose what little support I do have left. And to lose hope.

Someone tell me why I should stay on here. Tell me that this isnt as bad as it seems. Please tell me why theres still hope.

Hello @TheeCrazyBethy. My oldest sister’s always been really strict on what I wear, and she says I go behind her back. I stop wearing black and stop being who I am, or my guitar could get taken away, my musical escape. This isn’t your mother’s life, it’s your life. And when things get hard, you gotta do whatever it is you need to to find some happiness and support in the world. As long as it’s not illegal of course. Sometimes we have to defy our parents. If you know this community really helps you, then stay. You won’t be living with your mom forever.

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I am really sorry that is really hard. I would ask yourself why your mom feels this way. Is it her not wanting you to get better, is it a way for her to control you, is it causing you more stress or problems on here? Ultimately you need to do what’s best for you and I know it’s hard to go against a parent but you know yourself the best. You know what you need. Also, not sure where you live but in the US psychology is great to find a counselor. A lot dont take insurance but there is an option to search for sliding scales and it will tell you the range of rates. You can search for a specific kind of counselor. What I found is best is to call and ask the rates and that you are looking for a sliding scale. I lucked out and am able to see an intern and am only paying 40 dollars a week. Also to write love on her arms has a lot of resources to find groups in your area.

@Fashionlover0191I tried TWLOHA. I found 3 centers and some psychiatrists and therapists but after calling all of them, they dont take my insurance and I cant afford it out of pocket.

Both of u are right in that her mindset is probably one of trying to control me despite the fact I am an adult.

I’m sorry to hear that. I hate insurance so much. Please keep looking I know it can be really discouraging but I do believe it’s possible to find someone. If you can’t find someone are there any free groups in your area. Praying that you can find what you need and can get the help you deserve. I can tell that you want help and want to continue to get better. I hope you can continue to stay on here and it won’t make things worse with your mom. Rooting for you.

Wait. What? Why does your mom hate heart support so much. I don’t understand.

Does she know what they are trying to do for people?

Man I’m sorry. That really sucks.

You are an adult though and seems unfair for a parent to be so controlling in that way over a place meant to be good.


I hope things get better

My mom blames HS for bringing my best friend into my life and a situation there. But I dont think she should blame a whole organization for something that may not have worked but brought great joy to my life.

Shes aware of what this org does but doesnt care. Shes ignorant. Shes just looking for someone, anyone, to blame for things that werent in her control…shes a control freak.

Update: Im not leaving. She can attempt to strip away my dignity but she wont. This org has saved my life and will always be somewhere I want to be.

I will keep posting here as long as I need to.

While im here, know I took a big step forward…I shredded my suicide notes. I decided that choosing life is more important. It may take choosing life everyday for the rest of my life but I will do it.

Yea that’s unfair. Things may or not may not have worked out with your friend or whoever. But that person is not this organization. They are one person. Heart Support shouldn’t be defined by a decision you and someone in the community made or relationship issues. Or whatever went on. Sorry that your mom is so ignorant about the impact and change they have on people and the movement.

You be you. You’re an adult. Your mom may not like it but you as an adult have every right to be here. Where we can love and support you.

I hope it gets better for you in whatever you are struggling in.

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there is still hope. in the end you have to think about whats best for YOU. other people have opinions on whats right and wrong but if this community is helping you, you shouldn’t abandon it because someone else’s opinion thinks that it isn’t a good thing. being that this community is helping you maybe try to sit down and talk to her about your situation.