I want to do a quick update, Im doing better now!
It bummer sometime my suicidal thoughs come out of nowhere. I could having a great day, then all sudden, one little thing will go wrong, then I just fucking explode. I go on socal media and say im going to off myself. I also hurt myself, which is better I went 3 weeks without doing it. Its was becuase I did not play my guitar good and then just snap. Im been alot of these lately, such when I went to see Heart, I couldnt find my sister in the parking lot and when being a huge tool bag. I want snapping at people and my firend very uncomfortable. It suck when I have an anger problem.
Also, Im having friend coming on my vacation, last year we had a fight, where I snap at him and lately he been reminding me of it. He kept telling me that need remember my meds, it honestly been really getting me irrated. I try not to be jerk, some situation make me snap.
I wish that I can doing better with my problems, but still struggle. I hate that go on intragram and say I want to die in front of everyone. I hate that get my parents and friends stress out. I feel med I took along time still are affecting me and I was never this bad before.
However, I want to thanks everyone that reach out to me and that help throught this. It mean so much to me, that people do care about, even we never met in person, you words do help me so much. Thank you all again!!!