So its been a while since I posted anything but this is more of a progress report now but anyways after going through some stuff back in June may I add after giving birth to my 2 twins days after I talked about how my friend stopped hanging out with me. It turns out I was just being used by her to just give her all the money she wanted on a game I mainly worry she will do the same still on her streams but anyways after going through my mental hospital treatment I went on to get therapy for the rest of the time which I still am but I have been told I made alot of progress. With that being said I do feel like my old self is back which would be my happy side and its been a long time since I felt free of any suicidal thoughts and feelings. So I guess you can say that I feel like I did back then when I was 8 growing up and I do have a real best friend still but sometimes it does get lonely playing by myself. I really wish sometimes I could get more friends that like the same video games that I do. That’s about it for this update I’m just so happy for the first time in so long.
hello there friend!
confetti for feeling better and doing so well in therapy. Congrats on the twins as well!
What games are you into?
Mostly been playing fortnite I don’t have much access to online games
not a gamer, but i watch like a couple of gamers.
Hope you can find someone to share it with!
Hello @emoamy666
I am glad that you have come so far. Honestly i dont know if I should cry or smile at your post. It is so sad yet so inspiring. I feel like you are on the right track. Keep it up and I know you will feel even better. Best of luck to you. 
Wow @emoamy666, what a beautiful progress right there and an inspiring testimony of personal growth. You’ve been taking major steps to take care of yourself and receive the support you needed during some very rough times. That’s definitely something to celebrate and to be proud of!
It breaks my heart to hear about how this friend used you for their own interest. However, you seem to have really gained a lot of distance regarding this situation and are now able to focus on you, to take care of yourself and enjoy the things you like, which is amazing.
As for the games, it might be possible to find some nice, welcoming communities online made around the games you play. Sometimes even just being in a community of gamers without necessarily playing the same games can be a good way to connect with others and share a common passion! I’m more of a solo gamer so I cannot connect playing fortnite, but I’m always down for long geek conversations about video games (and many others too in our community).
If you’d like to connect with others sometimes, feel free to join the HeartSupport Discord server as well! It’s yet another nice place to break down this feeling of loneliness sometimes. 
Here’s a link to the server in case you’d like to join and haven’t been there already.