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Belongs to: Therapist Reacts to Wrong Side of Heaven by Five Finger Death Punch
US Navy Corpsman 87 to 95… What I have seen. There are things I will never forget, what Ive seen, the sounds, the smells… 22 a day. Veterans, Sacrificed so much. The nights I scare my wife with my dreams. Some nights I can not sleep, its not that I am unable, its that what am I going to dream about. There are things I can not, will not tell my wife or family what I have seen. Talking at a get together one time, telling stories, not realizing what I was saying, and my father tells me later, “I had not idea you experienced that”… I had to apologize for what I said, but it was not my place to say sorry. its was I experienced, its what I live with every day.
I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been going through recurring traumatic memories. I’ve heard numerous stories similar to yours, and I can certainly tell you that you are not alone. I understand that these flashbacks can impact many aspects of your daily life, with one significant one being your sleep. As a person who had bouts of insomnia in the past, I can recognise the stress and worry you feel as you lay on your bed, unknowing of what nightmares may occur. Please do not feel like you need to apologise for sharing your experience to family either, because like you said, it really is what you experienced and you do not need to cover that truth if you don’t want to.
I acknowledge how difficult it can be to open up to people, but if you need to share your emotions to somebody, then I hope that you can find a trusted person you can speak to, like your wife, another family member, or even a therapist.
Remember, you’re not alone in this; and I’m very glad that you decided to share your feelings on this trusted forum because by doing so, you’ve connected many other people who feel the same way you do. Please do not feel afraid to reach out again, as I and other compassionate volunteers will do our best to support you.
First off I just want to say thank you for being open with us here. We appreciate it and don’t take it for granted.
I cannot even begin to know what you went through, and how hard it is day by day. Please know you do not deserve what you went through and what you go through. I agree with you when you state it was not your place to say sorry. You should not have to say sorry with being open with those you love about what you have been through.
Although time has passed, please know that what you feel and go through is all valid. Not many can know how you feel and understand what you experienced. Please know that there are people who will listen and people who care. There are people who will understand and be there for you.
I believe that sharing what we go through and how we feel can help others feel less alone.
There is someone who was a part of the Heart Support team at one point, his name is Benjamin Sledge. If you google him he come right up. He is a writer, and he has written about his struggles with being in, and getting through, tours in Afghanistan and Iraq. I will leave his website linked below if you would like to take a look into it.
This is just an example of at least one person knowing how you feel and what you have been through to an extent… I hope that this can help you feel less alone in this.