I’ve been dealing with a lot of tragedy lately. My brother past away from a car accident, my friend was air cared after a cliff dying accident, and I had to tell my niece that she’ll never see her father again. I feel like I have no one to talk to about how I feeling.
I haven’t gone through quite the same but the loss of a loved is tragic and hard, its hard to get back after tragedy, please give yourself time to grieve, that family will always watch over you somehow. If you cry in public or private, who cares, let yourself grieve and process everything that’s happened
It can be really hard to deal with grief. By default, we often try and run away from the emotional experience. That’s OK for short periods of time, but in the long term, try to allow yourself to experience those feelings - it’ll help you process the grief more easily. I’m sorry you had to go through such a hard experience. There are a lot of great online communities where you can talk about mental health difficulties, including grieving. For example, if you look up a guy named tr33hugg3r206 on twitch, you’ll find a community of people willing to talk to you about your experiences with grief.