It’s really rough being a survivor of sexual violence and rape. Even being in a safe relationship now it haunts me. One of the attackers is now in prison, but I don’t know how to move forward in my life.
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Hi friend,
You are so brave and strong for sharing your story. I am so sorry those things happened to you. Talking about these things is a great place to start the healing journey. Healing is a long road but everyday that you work towards taking back the control others stole for you is worth it. I’m still healing but I seem to be having more good days than bad lately. I’m sure the bad days will come back but I try to surround myself with people I love and people who love me. It’s okay not to me okay. 
Hi Friend,
You are so brave for sharing this. I am an assault survivor as well, and I know that the pain often still lingers even though you are in a new and healthy relationship. I encourage you to be gentle with yourself and your healing. It is okay that your feelings are still lingering. Something that has really helped me is opening up about the situation, which it seems like you are doing and that’s awesome! I would also love to send you a copy of a book by one of board members about assault, it really helps with coping. If you need any resources, we are here for you! Sending love!
Thank you for sharing. That is insanely brave of you.
I can’t imagine how hard this must have been. I’m so proud of you for being able to trust and allow someone into your life.
I’m glad that one of your attackers is somewhere he can’t get you, but, I can see how you’re struggling to move forward.
I think that, if you trust your partner, talking to them about this can be useful, and, maybe have them go to see a therapist with you if you feel safe doing so… Take the power out of it. He can’t hurt you now.
This is also a really good place for you to start talking about it - we will stand beside you and walk along with you. Be a safe place for you. You’ve already taken the first step - keep going!
Hold Fast
Kayla
Hello Friend,
First thank you for sharing this, it’s very brave for you to do. I am also a survivor of assault and in a similar mindset. I would suggest opening up to your partner about it, see what they would be willing to do and work out a safeword for when you have these thoughts or any other issues that may have come with it, I personally still have panic attacks and I use a safeword for this. You can also use this word if you feel like your partner is being a little too much with the physical affection, setting this up will make them understand, Yes they are okay but this factor is just coming back and they need a bit of space. Your future is with your partner, see if your partner is will to write you a note or give you something to hold onto when you need the reminder they’re there when they maybe busy.
The fact one of the people who did this too you is in jail now is great news, use that as a small bit of peace. Focus on you and your life, that alone is the proof that those people didn’t win, their action won’t control you anymore.
Try to pick up a hobby, like art, writing, music, etc to vent this out if you feel speaking about it just can’t handle it. Be gentle with yourself, be fair with yourself. See if there is any resources around where you live that can help assault survivors.
I believe that you can move on and heal from this, please post onto the fourms more and use what heartsupport has as a jumping pad. We will always be here for you friend.
Hold Fast!
Thank you for sharing. I can’t imagine some of the things you have probably gone through. I can relate, however, in my past relationship. He was depressed, and emotionally abusive, and there are things that still make me rethink my current relationship. I am insecure because of it, and constantly need reassurance. It’s an ongoing thing that we can only try to work on. We can work on trusting our partners. I’m glad you have found a safe relationship. They should understand your past and work through things with you.
Hi there!
You are brave to share this and it is good that you are looking for help.
I know how you feel, because this has happened to me as well. The best advice I can give is that you should look for professional help. I know, it is hard and that it even seems impossible to talk about it, but psychotherapy was the only thing that worked for me and helped me to co live with it (Because you never really get over it, it is always in the background, you just learn how to colive with it and how not to hate yourself). It was a long and hard road, but worth taking. And took hard work with myself. So, I would suggest it to you.